S13E11 - Sing, Sing, Sing (With a Swing)

The Clone Wars rage across the galaxy. Led by the vicious General Grievous, the Confederacy of Independent Systems has burned a path of destruction across the borders of the Galactic Republic.

Seeking new weapons and new worlds to plunder, the Separatist army turned its eyes towards Nam Chorios, a prison world ruled over by the fallen Jedi, Beldorion.

Confronted by a brave team of SBI Agents with Jedi training, Grievous and Beldorion's nefarious plans were foiled, though the heroes escaped with little more than their lives....

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Hey everyone, thanks for listening to Star Wars Empire Wreckers, a Star Wars actual play podcast that's hotter than an erotica novel about a woman's relationship with the Kool-Aid man. Who is ready to skirt copyright law today? Or upskirt copyright law, I should say. God damn.

SPEAKER_04 0:25

I have seen Z porno where the Kool-Aid man gets stuck in Z-Wall. It was classy, I liked it.

SPEAKER_08 0:35

Starzign has been unfairly the subject of several eroticas. He has not seen one cent in royalties for his portrayal in multiple stories where he does things Starzine would never do, like still his seed willy-nilly.

SPEAKER_07 0:53

And Dlyria is open to intellectual debate about whether or not fucking the Kool-Aid Man counts as the monster fucker genre.

SPEAKER_01 1:04

And if you're ready to know whatever it is we're talking about, apparently it's called Cold Sweat by Vera Valentine. But if you're already familiar, why don't you come along with us to a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away in Star Wars? The clone wars rage across the galaxy. Led by the vicious General Grievous, the Confederacy of Independent Systems has burned a path of destruction across the borders of the Galactic Republic. Seeking new weapons and new worlds to plunder, the Separatist Army turned its eyes toward Nam Chorius, a prison world ruled over by the fallen Jedi Baldorian. Confronted by a brave team of SBI agents with Jedi training, Grievous and Beldorian's nefarious plans were foiled, though the heroes escaped with little more than their lives.

SPEAKER_11 1:49

Oh yeah, depending on how long it's been between sessions, maybe I could have gotten a gun.

SPEAKER_01 1:54

It's been a while, so after your encounter with General Grievous, uh a notorious Jedi killer, um, you've been given about like three months uh there since your last mission, so 1500 credits. Um, and you've had a lot of sort of additional psychological check-ins to make sure there's no lingering trauma from the mission. Uh like Grievous has killed dozens and dozens of Jedi, so it's kind of a miracle that you guys managed to make it out alive at all. Hallone's lightsaber was taken, that was kind of the only loss you had. I don't each get 1500 credits.

SPEAKER_07 2:31

Whatever, I wouldn't have been able to dual-wield it anyways, because my new one is double-handed.

SPEAKER_04 2:36

We each get 1500 credits, by the way.

SPEAKER_11 2:38

Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 2:39

And enough time has passed that I think we can use the uh 250,000 that you each have from uh your ill-gotten gains. So yeah, it's been uh three months since the Grievous mission, and it was a little while between uh that and when you actually uh ferreted away that extra money. So have you guys spent any of that?

SPEAKER_11 3:01

Well, I would have to replace my gun because I had to leave mine behind.

SPEAKER_01 3:04

Yeah, you did have to leave yours behind.

SPEAKER_11 3:07

Yeah. Cause I'm I'm trying to remember when I uh wanted to get the gun before and I had all my money taken, was that the Night Stinger blaster rifle?

SPEAKER_01 3:14

I believe so.

SPEAKER_11 3:15

Okay. Can I when I go to try to get one this time, like one, can I perhaps figure out a different weapons dealer to go to to get this? And two, would the gang come with me just in case? In case things go sideways, I don't want to get mugged again.

SPEAKER_01 3:34

Uh so to have found a different underworld weapons dealer. Um this will probably be a knowledge underworld. Uh maybe a streetwise. Yeah, I'll do streetwise. Okay. Uh chorus a big place. Uh, so we'll call this a three purple with a black.

SPEAKER_11 3:54

Three purple. I don't suppose I could get help from anyone if I go and I'm like, hey guys.

SPEAKER_04 4:00

I will help I will help you. I am there for you.

SPEAKER_11 4:04

Could I get blues from conferring with my friends?

SPEAKER_01 4:07

Yeah, if you want. I think like the three between the three of them, you could probably get like a blue. Okay.

SPEAKER_11 4:14

Well, I mean, we'll see. I I don't what do we have for Destiny points? Well, I mean, I'll just roll it. Uh no. I have a yellow and two green, plus this blue. Let's. Hmm, a failure and two advantage. Would we know someone that we could ask?

SPEAKER_01 4:30

Uh, well, uh, Chris does have a on-again, off again uh paramour that runs in those kinds of circles.

SPEAKER_11 4:40

Yeah, Chris, can you call up Zin and ask her?

SPEAKER_04 4:43

I can I I can call up Zinn and be like, okay, so I'm gonna call up Zinn.

SPEAKER_01 4:47

But uh is this gonna be a video call or is this gonna be it's it's basically you're just asking if she has any leads on somewhere where uh Kala could pick up some new equipment.

SPEAKER_04 4:59

Okay, alright, so I'm gonna I'm gonna call her up and I'm gonna be like, uh bon uh bonjour.

SPEAKER_12 5:07

Do you do you want us to give you some privacy for this? No, no, no, we'll be done right away. Uh uh. Wee wee.

SPEAKER_00 5:17

Don't worry, I will be done right away.

SPEAKER_01 5:21

And she says, Chris, uh, I thought I asked you not to call me on my work line. Am I calling you on your work line or well I'm at work, I'm over at the uh the Senate building.

SPEAKER_04 5:31

And this is your line. Forgive me, I will make sure that I don't do anything disruptive in the future, but I can't promise that I'll up uh uphold that. Uh I do have a question, though. Um, where's a good place that my friend can buy some guns?

SPEAKER_11 5:48

Thought that this was the twerk line.

SPEAKER_04 5:51

Uh is that is is there a good place is there a good place where we may buy some weaponry for my friend who is desperate for a pistol in her hand?

SPEAKER_10 6:02

A rifle. A rifle.

SPEAKER_04 6:04

The long long th the long thick uh rod of uh uh spurting deadly weaponry outs out the end of it.

SPEAKER_11 6:15

She's gonna point us to a sex shop. Why are you talking like that?

SPEAKER_09 6:18

For for a friend.

SPEAKER_11 6:19

For a friend. She's gonna tell us to go to go to Squato's.

SPEAKER_12 6:24

We don't know. Why are you guys being so weird? I'm just talking to her.

SPEAKER_09 6:31

Some sort of narrow boy.

SPEAKER_04 6:33

Is that a new kind is that a new kind of weaponry?

SPEAKER_09 6:35

In a way.

SPEAKER_01 6:38

So uh this would probably be uh you'll have to charm her.

SPEAKER_04 6:42

Uh off to a good start. Off to a good start, I hope. Uh add some blacks to that.

SPEAKER_01 6:48

Yeah, she is um she is kind of in with uh in with the Senate. She's uh she's a Senate aide. Uh you can add a blue from Kala's advantage that she got, because you kind of like have a feeling that she might know. Um this is gonna be against three purple. Three purple and add a blue.

SPEAKER_09 7:06

There's the sexy danger that it's at work too. Ooh.

SPEAKER_01 7:09

Yeah, uh you can add a an additional blue, but also a black because she shouldn't be talking about this at work, but you do kind of have a really good one. I like talking with that at work.

SPEAKER_04 7:19

Do you know something about me? I can take away that black. Ooh, there we go.

SPEAKER_11 7:24

Tell us how you can remove those black dyes like.

SPEAKER_09 7:27

Oh fuck, I should have kept my mouth shut.

SPEAKER_04 7:29

Uh two success to advantage.

SPEAKER_00 7:32

Ooh, nice.

SPEAKER_01 7:34

She's she says, um Well, yes, I think uh I should be able to help you with your request. Um I will uh forward you the information that I have. Uh you should receive it shortly.

SPEAKER_04 7:47

Okay, I I look forward to your messaging. Uh is the advantage gonna be that she includes a nude?

SPEAKER_00 7:55

Yeah, I was about to say.

SPEAKER_01 7:57

Yeah, there there is uh when when she she texts you uh an address and also like it appears she's stolen away to like the Senate rotunda, like the Senate bathrooms. She's in like a stall. There is a a bit of a flirty pick included.

SPEAKER_09 8:16

Give me like uh that couple that banged in the Senate that one time.

SPEAKER_04 8:20

Uh I uh I give you uh the address and then I sneak away to the bathroom myself.

SPEAKER_11 8:27

Don't worry, I'll be fast.

SPEAKER_09 8:29

That's the that's the uh second advantage.

SPEAKER_04 8:34

That's how quick it goes. You want to hear how quick it goes? One second. It goes this quick. It goes.

SPEAKER_00 8:42

Yeah, literally the door closes and then the door opens again. He's done.

SPEAKER_09 8:47

Okay, I'm done. It's the uh the Barney getting thrown out of my office. Alright, I'm back on headset. Okay, we'll wait for uh clone high moment.

SPEAKER_11 9:02

Okay, well if we have a location, can I uh we'll wait till Chris is done, give him five minutes, and then everyone come down with me.

SPEAKER_09 9:10

Give him five fingers, and he'll be good.

SPEAKER_11 9:17

Where are they? I've said too much. Okay, can we can we go down there and then uh maybe Chris can help me negotiate a better price? Or at least, you know, I can afford it if we can't get a better price, but I'll be there for uh backup support.

SPEAKER_09 9:31

Yeah, and intimidation.

SPEAKER_11 9:32

And Illyria will also be there.

SPEAKER_07 9:35

Maybe fan. Maybe I have fancy. I have I have one yellow in negotiation. Yeah. Uh, education, I can find you a good gun. Thank you.

SPEAKER_01 9:45

I didn't know what I want, baby. So uh you can head down into the lower levels of of Querscent. Down into the like the the 1000s where where shit's kinda dank. And you can find find this address. It's a little like hole in the wall in the middle of a slum where it's like, if you didn't know any better, you would think this was like a cracked den. Right on. Uh, but you do know better, so in addition to being a cracked den, uh there is also somebody there who apparently uh has a lot of black market goods.

SPEAKER_11 10:24

Do they have the night singer blaster rifle?

SPEAKER_04 10:27

I thought you were gonna say, do they have any black market bads?

SPEAKER_11 10:32

Do they have the baddest blaster rifle in town?

SPEAKER_07 10:35

Night Singer, isn't that that lesbian from Baldur's Gate 3?

SPEAKER_01 10:39

This is the Night Stinger.

SPEAKER_07 10:41

Oh, Night Stinger, sorry.

SPEAKER_01 10:43

So, uh, there there is a uh a duro who is like maintaining uh what passes for a shop in this kind of like slum. It seems to be like an apartment almost. And roll me a uh probably a s either a streetwise or a negotiation to to see his wares to see if he even has that and if he'll show it to you.

SPEAKER_11 11:10

I mean my s I have a yellow and two green to streetwise. Does anyone else else have better streetwiser negotiation? Uh oh, I'm good at negotiation.

SPEAKER_04 11:19

I'm I got uh yellow and three green.

SPEAKER_11 11:22

Oh shit, yeah. Chris, negotiate. Okay. I'll be muttering over your shoulder just like ask him if he has the night sting. Yeah, that'll be a stinger.

SPEAKER_01 11:30

Two purple and oh sorry, a two red and a purple. Two red and a purple?

SPEAKER_04 11:34

Yeah. Two red, purple. Uh hello, sir. I was wondering if you had uh something that maybe stings people at night, and let's roll. Failure and advantage. Hmm.

SPEAKER_01 11:46

Well he says, uh, I don't think I can help you there, but uh why don't you take a look in my drawers? You have some very nice pants, sir. And uh he goes over to like there's this little island in the kitchen, and he like opens the drawers, and there's other blaster rifles in there, not the night stinger.

SPEAKER_11 12:03

Oh, not the night stinger. No. Oh, I wanted the night stinger. What other ones? Well, he doesn't have it. Aww. Okay, what does he have instead?

SPEAKER_01 12:14

What are you in the market for?

SPEAKER_11 12:16

I wanted a night stinger, but you know, something uh long range.

SPEAKER_01 12:20

Long range, no, okay.

SPEAKER_11 12:22

Something that uses the ranged heavy skill, not a gunnery.

SPEAKER_02 12:25

You uh looking for something, uh, like a sniper rifle?

SPEAKER_07 12:29

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 12:31

She's looking for something when some oomph.

SPEAKER_07 12:34

Respectfully, when have we ever fought somebody at long range?

SPEAKER_11 12:38

Uh, well you haven't because you always carry around your fucking I'm not gonna say it in front of this weapons dealer. I choose to deal with people at long range. Don't you remember when I popped that Mandalorian's hat off? And you wanna know why? Because I made the choice to go to long range. I'm good at one thing, Illyria.

SPEAKER_04 12:55

We need to be sure we are ready for anything.

SPEAKER_11 12:59

You know, look, I'm looking for something, uh, I guess real long range, something something stealthy, something that uh, you know, lightweight for what it is, but you know, like not too lightweight, it's just, you know, not like nothing with like cumbersome five or anything, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_04 13:16

Can you replace her hand with a handgun, like an actual like laser coming out of her finger?

SPEAKER_11 13:22

Ignore him, I don't want that. Oh, I that sounds rad as hell. I want one. Okay, well do it for yourself then, you weirdo.

SPEAKER_01 13:32

And he says, uh how do you feel about slug throwers?

SPEAKER_11 13:35

I well, I want something with a stun satin. So anything that can go to stun.

SPEAKER_01 13:40

Well, it's a shame, because I uh recently came into something that um might fit the bill.

SPEAKER_11 13:44

It doesn't have a stun satin?

SPEAKER_01 13:46

Nope. Ugh. It's for killing it. It's a model 38 Zerka Adventurer sharpshooter rifle. It was uh recently acquired uh from the collection of a uh notorious bounty hunter who ended up unfortunately imprisoned.

SPEAKER_04 14:04

Ooh, why uh what happened to him that made him go in prison?

SPEAKER_02 14:08

Well, caught by the Republic. Ah, yes, that'll do it. But I can uh guarantee that it's uh quite quite a good weapon.

SPEAKER_10 14:16

Who who's it from?

SPEAKER_11 14:18

I guess it doesn't really matter. Uh it's only slugs. Uh no combosome.

SPEAKER_04 14:24

I'm I'm sorry, the uh this is the uh It's got accurate two, Pierce 3.

SPEAKER_10 14:30

Yeah, okay.

SPEAKER_01 14:32

Hey, if I uh got a guy in the back, if you uh want some mods, I could uh probably hook you up.

SPEAKER_11 14:39

Yeah, you know that's good. I I I would like some mods.

SPEAKER_07 14:43

Yeah, okay. When you said there was a guy in the back, I thought you meant to test out the gun.

SPEAKER_01 14:49

I got that too.

SPEAKER_11 14:52

Nah, we can do that in the field, it's fine. Uh what's that gonna be for this one?

SPEAKER_01 14:57

You want the mods?

SPEAKER_11 14:58

Yeah, but you're like, do you want me to buy the gun first?

SPEAKER_01 15:01

It'll be uh 4,000 for the gun, and then uh if you want anything else, that'll be extra.

SPEAKER_11 15:06

Uh Chris, you wanna argue him down?

SPEAKER_01 15:09

Do you want to argue him down?

SPEAKER_11 15:10

Uh you know what?

SPEAKER_02 15:11

Uh yeah, I can ar uh I'm gonna argue him down.

SPEAKER_11 15:14

Or maybe argue for a discount on the mods if we because that is a little bit marked up, but not like insanely marked up.

SPEAKER_01 15:20

You you do also have 250,000 credits. It's true. And you and last time you tried to uh negotiate the price, you got kicked out and all your money stolen.

SPEAKER_11 15:28

Uh, you know what? Fine. 4,000?

SPEAKER_01 15:30

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 15:31

You don't you don't you don't want me to negotiate? I won't negotiate then.

SPEAKER_11 15:34

No, yeah, 4,000. That's that's good, that's good.

SPEAKER_04 15:38

I could see you kicking the ground.

SPEAKER_11 15:40

Fine. Fine K. I'm gonna get the multi-optic site, number one. Let's do force-attuned resonator to get that prescient shot. Yeah, slug thrower's oppressor, that's probably a good idea. And let's get superior. So let's use up all four hard points. So it says that with if I'm doing all the optional mods, then it would be 8,400 for the base cost.

SPEAKER_01 16:09

So after you've laid out everything that you want. It says, looking at uh those uh upgrades you're looking for, I'm thinking about probably 7500.

SPEAKER_11 16:20

Oh, so less. I don't say that out loud. 7500? Not 850.

SPEAKER_01 16:25

For the uh multi-optic site, the slug thrower suppressor, and the general upgrades.

SPEAKER_11 16:30

The well it's the four, isn't it? The superior and the force tune resonator too.

SPEAKER_01 16:35

Do you got the- Well that's that's the curious thing. It's uh my guide took a look at the weapon it already had when installed, so it must be your lucky day. I don't know how we missed that.

SPEAKER_11 16:44

Well, is that for uh for what?

SPEAKER_01 16:46

The Forsitune Resonator or the uh I didn't know what it was, I thought it was just uh doohickey. Didn't seem to do anything.

SPEAKER_11 16:52

I don't love that there's backstory happening here. This makes me feel like the person who this belonged to is gonna pop up and then take it back and I'm gonna be without a gun again.

SPEAKER_04 17:01

I am curious as to why it was recommended to this guy, but that's okay.

SPEAKER_09 17:05

What if the person who stone it is inside of it, haunting it?

SPEAKER_11 17:08

I'm not thinking about that. 7500? Yeah. I'm not gonna look a gift gun in the mouth, sure. Gift gun down the muzzle. You're not that depressed. Not yet. We'll see if I lose this fucking gun again. Okay, you got it, my man.

SPEAKER_00 17:26

With all the mods. Does anybody else uh wanna try getting any underworld goods while you're here?

SPEAKER_09 17:33

Do they perchance have a light bow? I feel like that would still be in my aesthetic range, but have uh running capabilities, yes.

SPEAKER_07 17:43

I don't understand. We just got our lightsabers back, and you're also willing to cast them aside for frivolous underground weapons?

SPEAKER_11 17:52

You're right, you're right, Illyria. How about next time you have to do a ranged attack, you just fling your lightsaber into someone's face, and then you could lose that one too. Oh, don't you shit about my gun.

SPEAKER_09 18:07

You got served. Bitch!

SPEAKER_01 18:10

So, uh Starzan, why don't you roll me a uh knowledge warfare to see if you can identify any uh relevant ranged weapons.

SPEAKER_09 18:21

I am great at knowledge. Starzan is great at knowledge.

SPEAKER_01 18:26

Use second take. Okay. Uh we'll call it a two purple and a black.

SPEAKER_09 18:31

Nil.

SPEAKER_01 18:32

Nothing, okay. Um so based on what he's uh presenting to you, there isn't like the closest, there is like a Wookiee bowcaster, but other than that, there's nothing like that's uh like a more of a a long bow or anything like that.

SPEAKER_09 18:48

That you can I will look at this, I will examine this bow caster. Kind of give it a little looksy doodle.

SPEAKER_01 18:54

Yeah, it looks it looks in pretty good shape. Um it's it seems like like a lot of the stuff he has is probably stuff that was pilfered off the corpses of would-be bounty hunters and mercenaries and uh that kind of thing. So there is one that's it seems like it was in pretty good condition. There's some minor scuffs on it. Um it's not like immediately damaged or anything. It if you wanted to pick it up, it would it would serve as, you know, a bowcaster does.

SPEAKER_09 19:24

I'll kind of just pose with it, you know, all muscled up and holding it, like tightly, gripping it and turning to the the gang and doing like an action star pose and like is this Starzan?

SPEAKER_11 19:35

I think I'm gonna go.

SPEAKER_04 19:38

Is is Starzan pulling it off? Do I have to roll something to figure that out?

SPEAKER_11 19:42

It's not effectively conceal your thunder, but why would you ever want to conceal that?

SPEAKER_09 19:46

Have like kind of Rambo look going on. Starzan will take trinket. Yeah. Well, that'll be uh 1500 then. Yeah, I'll do that. We just got 1500, so that works.

SPEAKER_07 19:55

I'm embarrassed by what Kala said, so can I uh subtly look for a sh a medium range blaster? I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_04 20:03

I'm sorry. I'm good with my variable holdout blaster for now and a stand my lightsaber.

SPEAKER_01 20:10

So, uh Illyria, what kind of are you looking for just like a pistol?

SPEAKER_07 20:13

Something that's uh Yeah, I was like looking at the holdout ones. There's the two medium range. Something that's gonna be As far as short range.

SPEAKER_01 20:21

Short range is like within the same room. Like I feel like for most purposes, shortly.

SPEAKER_07 20:26

I'm in the same room I can if I get in a small room, I could use my life.

SPEAKER_01 20:31

You can get I guess that's true. One maneuver can get you from short range to engaged.

SPEAKER_07 20:35

Yeah, one of medium range.

SPEAKER_01 20:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 20:37

I guess it doesn't have to be a holdout one, but those ones are tiny.

SPEAKER_01 20:40

Uh so why don't you roll me a uh knowledge lore? Give me a three purple knowledge lore.

SPEAKER_07 20:48

One failure three advantage.

SPEAKER_01 20:50

Gotta succeed one day, Jesus. So you don't know what it is. Um, so you would kind of have to be buying it a little bit blind, but you can see that one of the blasters very faintly there is an engraving of uh the symbol of the Jedi Order on it.

SPEAKER_07 21:08

Oh my god. Uh what is this?

SPEAKER_01 21:12

Uh that's a that's a replica. It's it's not an original.

SPEAKER_07 21:16

But does it work?

SPEAKER_01 21:17

Yeah, it works.

SPEAKER_07 21:18

I'll I'll take it.

SPEAKER_01 21:20

Alright, that'll be uh 2,000. Seems a little bit steep for a replica.

SPEAKER_07 21:25

Is he okay? Can I have this replica? Can I negotiate?

SPEAKER_04 21:30

Uh excuse me, I don't s I don't think a replica usually costs that much. Why do why is it$2,000? Or two thousand credits? I say.

SPEAKER_01 21:42

Well, you know, it's still pretty old. It's uh it's a really good replica. I've uh never actually been able to get it to work. Uh so I I assume it's a replica. It doesn't seem to fire.

SPEAKER_07 21:53

Didn't I just uh ask if it worked? Did I not just ask if it worked?

SPEAKER_01 21:57

Like I could put a charge in it, but uh Look, I pulled the trigger and he like picks it up and he clicks the trigger. Nothing happens. It works as a replica.

SPEAKER_11 22:06

Oh. Cause maybe it has the same like force thing on it where it only works if you have the force.

SPEAKER_07 22:11

Or does it need a Kyberger? It's force locked?

SPEAKER_11 22:15

Well, because that was a th the mod that I just put on mine was uh the uh the force-attuned resonator where you have to have at least force rating one to operate it.

SPEAKER_09 22:24

Pretty clever. You know what's happening? Every lightsaber.

SPEAKER_07 22:29

That's can I see it?

SPEAKER_01 22:31

Look with your eyes, not with your hands.

SPEAKER_07 22:33

Uh can I at least get a bit of a discount since it doesn't work, clearly?

SPEAKER_02 22:37

Yeah,$2,000 is a lot of money. Yeah, give me a charmer negotiation.

SPEAKER_07 22:42

Charmer negotiation.

SPEAKER_04 22:43

Can I add my uh ranks and charms?

SPEAKER_01 22:46

Illyri, you're the one trying to negotiate. Fine. Uh, this will be against three purple.

SPEAKER_07 22:53

One success, one triumph, one threat. Ooh.

SPEAKER_01 22:58

And he says, yeah, fine, I can uh probably give this to you for it. Nothing more than a toy, let's say uh 1500, but don't don't tell anyone I did that. I got a reputation.

SPEAKER_07 23:11

I'll take it.

SPEAKER_01 23:12

Okay, so uh you can purchase the Site 145 replica blaster pistol.

SPEAKER_09 23:18

Sweet. Gun club!

SPEAKER_01 23:21

So once you guys have uh procured your new armaments, you can return to your apartment. And on the way back, you can see that there is a Republic gunship parked outside.

SPEAKER_11 23:34

Oh yeah, did we ever uh check our apartment for listening devices after we got back?

SPEAKER_01 23:40

Why don't you have rolled me a uh three purple perception? All of us? All of us? Whoever wants to have looked for listening devices in your apartment. I'm I'm gonna look for listening devices.

SPEAKER_09 23:51

Starzan somehow decided he he was looking for literal bugs, but someone said that, but he didn't figure out. Three purple perception? Three purple?

SPEAKER_11 24:00

Oh, interesting. One triumph. Hmm. Two two failures to advantage.

SPEAKER_09 24:06

One threat. The threat was I found an actual bug. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 24:10

Yeah, so this would have been something that you had uh done when you got back.

SPEAKER_00 24:15

Yeah, after we found all those uh bugs on the custard gannet. Starzen, you did find a lot of like bugs uh crawling around.

SPEAKER_01 24:24

Like somebody brought in bed bugs from somewhere. Oh no. They're the worst. Uh you got two threads. You did have to spend uh It was not me, it was a one on the men collectively 200 credits to get those cleaned out from whoever did that.

SPEAKER_09 24:43

Oh no. Just open the airlock on our apartment. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 24:49

Uh it made sense in my head. Chris and Cala, you got advantage and triumph. If you want to not have been responsible for the bed bugs.

SPEAKER_11 24:58

Man, I don't want to have to use my triumph for that.

SPEAKER_01 25:01

It wouldn't be used for that, but it would just uh Okay. Wasn't me, man. Yeah, so it was either Illyria or Starzan who brought in the bed bugs.

SPEAKER_07 25:09

Wait, what was the role so I can deny this?

SPEAKER_01 25:13

Uh three purple perception.

SPEAKER_07 25:15

Oh man.

SPEAKER_09 25:16

Starzan was playing in the jungle and may have picked up someone.

SPEAKER_07 25:21

One failure, one threat.

SPEAKER_00 25:22

Okay, so Elyria brought in the bed bugs. Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_07 25:33

No, I found a couch on the side of the road and brought it in. I was like, free couch.

SPEAKER_11 25:37

Free couch. Elyria's like, what looking at the sign, just like, what are b-bugs?

SPEAKER_00 25:46

B-bugs.

SPEAKER_01 25:47

Chris and Cala, you didn't find any listening devices in your apartment. Um, but as you were scooting around, you did find some like panels and stuff that led to like maintenance access hatches. If anything should ever happen where you need to like make a quick escape from your apartment for whatever reason, you have identified uh some non-obvious exits from your suite.

SPEAKER_11 26:14

That's not ominous. I'm glad we have this knowledge at least.

SPEAKER_04 26:17

Yeah. Just, you know, uh be thankful for the time that we have.

SPEAKER_01 26:22

But there is a uh Republic gunship parked outside your building. Are they here for us? Shall we say hello? Uh so you can Is it gray? It is it is gray, uh, although it takes a while for you to recognize him because um he is wearing a new uniform. He used to be wearing this kind of like gray nondescript suit, but now he's in an actual like uniform uniform. He's got on the sort of white military tunic, he's got uh black pants and boots on, and he's got like a little like uh rank plaque on his chest, even with a couple of uh a couple of blue rectangles on it.

SPEAKER_11 27:00

Does he have the does he have a little hat? You know the one. He's got a he's got a little hat on. Hello, Gray. You're looking very fascist coded today.

SPEAKER_01 27:10

Hey, it's uh I'm glad I caught you. I wasn't I wasn't sure if you'd be home. Um no, uh we moved from the Karath. The Kareth has been uh moved on to uh other lines, and uh they've actually uh built a new SBI headquarters here on Coruscant that I'm working out of now.

SPEAKER_11 27:27

Oh wow, congratulations.

SPEAKER_01 27:29

Uh yep, new new uniforms, um new title. I'm supervisor gray now, actually. Oh, supervisor. Yeah.

unknown 27:38

Okay.

SPEAKER_04 27:40

Does that mean you will walk walk down the hallways that tonight and tell people to not make so much noise?

SPEAKER_01 27:45

Well, I'm not exactly that kind of supervisor. Uh I supervise assets like yourselves.

SPEAKER_04 27:50

Uh I too supervise asses every once in a while.

SPEAKER_11 27:55

I'm I'm sure that you do. Anyway, supervisor, what can we do for you today? Well, um, can we go inside? Of your ship or our apartment? Uh your apartment. Uh okay. Has no Grey would never have been in our apartment. Is it is it suitable for visitors? The bedbugs?

SPEAKER_09 28:18

Is it possible they're vampires?

SPEAKER_01 28:21

Is Grey a vampire? You you have no evidence that he's not a vampire. Oh shit. But you have no evidence that he uh he he did tell you not to get excited when he was sending you to the planet of twilight.

SPEAKER_09 28:33

Oh.

SPEAKER_00 28:34

Oh. Because he knew we'd be excited about vampires, it's true.

SPEAKER_09 28:38

Because of that popular uh melodrama Hollow Space Light.

SPEAKER_01 28:43

Yeah, he he but how he doesn't appear to be an anzati, he is a human. So if he is a vampire, he's a he's a different type. Uh so he uh can join you inside and he says, thanks. Uh it's a little awkward giving a uh a briefing out on the porch there.

SPEAKER_04 28:59

It's okay. You are a little awkward, so that is alright. We expect it.

SPEAKER_01 29:03

You know, maybe uh next time you can you can come by the uh the headquarters and I can kind of show you around.

SPEAKER_11 29:08

Uh yeah. I mean you say next time as if we invited you here to do the briefing and you didn't just show up. You know, next time you could send us an invite and we'll come on over. But yeah, it was I was uh in the neighborhood.

SPEAKER_00 29:19

Ah, like Mr. Rogers. I you like Mr. Rogers, Supervisor Gray. Well, I I don't know who that is, uh, so I can't say whether or not I'm like him.

SPEAKER_11 29:29

Hello neighbor. You know, Mr. Space Rogers.

SPEAKER_12 29:32

Oh, Mr.

SPEAKER_01 29:33

Spodgers, yeah. Mr.

SPEAKER_04 29:35

Spodgers. It's a wonderful day in the galaxy.

SPEAKER_01 29:38

They uh they used to put him on at the Kinder Block I was raised in. He's uh good show, good show. Uh yes, Kinder Block.

SPEAKER_11 29:44

Do they have Kinder Blocks at this time? Yeah. Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_12 29:50

Well well then.

SPEAKER_11 29:51

Okay.

SPEAKER_10 29:53

Anyways.

SPEAKER_01 29:54

Anyway, uh, so um that actually, uh speaking of, uh that kind of ties into uh what I would like to ask you guys to follow up on today.

SPEAKER_04 30:06

Ooh.

SPEAKER_01 30:07

So uh there is a Jedi seeker that uh we'd like you to take a look at.

SPEAKER_04 30:13

Okay. What do what does it mean to be a seeker if you if you don't know?

SPEAKER_01 30:17

Well, as you guys know, uh most Jedi are given to the order by their families when they're very young. Um and the people who go and uh collect those kids and scout them out, they those are seekers.

SPEAKER_09 30:29

Uh child snatcher.

SPEAKER_01 30:31

Uh yes, I suppose.

SPEAKER_10 30:32

I mean, yeah, it's uh complicated thing.

SPEAKER_01 30:36

Not snatched. Well, I mean, this case is a little odd, but no, uh traditionally Jedi, it's all done completely consensually. Um a lot of families, they actually contact the Republic fairly often to check in to see how their kids are doing. We actually usually get a couple dozen requests a week from families asking for status updates, and you know, we can't really send back anything more than uh a confirmation that they're still counted as being on the Jedi roster. It's still alive. Yeah, but you know, for most of them that's enough. But since the war started, that number has jumped from a few dozen per week to over a hundred every single day.

SPEAKER_11 31:19

Yeah, everyone wanted to know if the kids DOA The machine needs more child soldiers.

SPEAKER_01 31:25

A lot of them who have never uh contacted us before are wanting to know how their kids are doing. In some cases it's been a decade or more since they last saw them, but you know, war changes things. But never changes. And we've come up against a kind of peculiar issue. Uh not all of the people whose names are mentioned by their families are in the records of the Jedi.

SPEAKER_04 31:53

Oh. Are there people who uh are looking for people who aren't related to them?

SPEAKER_01 31:59

Well, it's not that. Um, you know, cases like this are not common, uh, but unfortunately they're not uncommon. Um, oftentimes somebody will pose as a Jedi in order to kidnap a child. Usually it turns out to just be a relative or somebody that somebody knows that's trying to get access to the child. Uh the kids themselves are rarely actually force sensitive, and the Jedi are usually very quick to respond in these cases because obviously they want uh their seekers and their acquisition division to be thought of generally in in good terms. So these cases are usually dealt with pretty swiftly. But we have 13 confirmed cases of families who were coerced, we'll say, into giving up their child to a Jedi, and that child never making it back to Coruscant or any other Jedi temple on record.

SPEAKER_11 32:57

Ah. And uh you said it's a s a Sika. Are these all kind of connected to the same Sika?

SPEAKER_01 33:03

All 13 cases have independently described the same woman. Uh human woman over the past twenty years. Uh descriptions of her age change, but uh the physical description always matches, and he turns on a hologram. A Jedi Knight by the name of Anyakuro.

SPEAKER_11 33:22

Would we know anything about Anyakiro?

SPEAKER_01 33:25

Probably not. The hologram he's showing you is uh this kind of stern-looking human woman in her mid-40s, and he says this hologram uh is based on information that we had from her about 20 years ago, so I think she would predate most of you. Does that mean go out for coffee before going out for a real date?

SPEAKER_11 33:46

I mean, you say predate most of us. Uh, would she have recruited any of us? Or acquired any of us?

SPEAKER_01 33:54

It's possible. Um, if cause Gray he says, so the reason this is kind of our last record is because she went into a self-imposed exile after losing a Padawan about 20 years ago, and she's been off the map for the past couple of decades, but has apparently still been fulfilling her job as a seeker. So if any of you were picked up by a Jedi and brought to the Order uh o over 20 years ago, between 20 and 30 years ago, then it's possible that she was the person who picked you up.

SPEAKER_11 34:28

I mean, I feel like that would have been most of us, because like Callissette is like 29, and I think she's the oldest of the group. I'm sure they've got lots of seekers, though. Yeah, but wouldn't it be fun if she was also the one who snatched us? Okay.

SPEAKER_01 34:42

So let's uh let's let the force decide. Uh who of you wants her to have been the person who snatched you?

SPEAKER_04 34:55

Sure. I don't think that works with my story quite, so yeah.

SPEAKER_11 35:00

Yeah, cause you you have a a wealthy family that probably uh this would have been before she went off the map.

SPEAKER_01 35:07

You guys wouldn't be any of the 13 who were stolen. This would have been when she was still officially doing her job as she was supposed to be.

SPEAKER_09 35:14

Yeah. Mine was Starzan's was uh kind of trade like a diplomatic thing, like, oh, you're so important.

SPEAKER_01 35:20

Yeah, she may have been sent even just like sent to collect you on on behalf of So yes for Starzan, Kala.

SPEAKER_11 35:27

I mean, if it's like a seeker who ha potentially has b like using underhanded methods for getting kids, let's say yes, because that would make me feel comforted if my parents did not wish to give me up.

SPEAKER_01 35:42

Okay, Illyria.

SPEAKER_07 35:44

Sure.

SPEAKER_01 35:45

Okay, and Chris, you're saying no? I'm saying no. Okay. So each of you roll a force die. If it's light, then the result aligns with what you want for your character. If it's dark, uh, it goes the other way.

SPEAKER_11 35:59

Okay. Too dark side. Oh, too light side. She did not pick me up, I guess. She did not pick up Elyria. She did pick up me. Starzan and Chris.

SPEAKER_01 36:09

Too dark side. Too dark side, okay. And Chris? Uh, let's see. Too light side. Okay. So, uh, Illyria and Starzan. Um, no, you don't recognize her. Chris, you don't recognize her. Kala. You do there is something in the back of your brain that's being tickled when you see the picture of this woman. Like, just like I don't know if you remember her, or but it's like, this person seems familiar to you.

SPEAKER_10 36:37

I feel like I know that lady. I feel like I know her.

SPEAKER_01 36:40

Gray says, uh, yes, we uh actually did some digging. Uh, Call, we can confirm that Anya Kira was the seeker who uh brought you to the Coruscent Temple when you were a child.

SPEAKER_11 36:54

So it's her fault. I don't say that, just like, oh, okay. Um, huh. Interesting. Anyways, do you uh do you have any idea of where she might be holed up? Uh, might have been holin' up?

SPEAKER_01 37:08

We don't, but we know someone who does. Okay. Uh, well, I told you that she went into exile after losing a Padawan. Turns out, uh, that Padawan didn't actually die. Uh I'm not sure what the full story is there, but she eventually made a name for herself, uh, a bit of a bounty hunter, and she's currently in Republic Custody. And he flips his hologram and he says, uh, are any of you familiar with a bounty hunter by the name of Aura Singh?

SPEAKER_10 37:41

Oh, would we be?

SPEAKER_11 37:43

Let's be a two-purple knowledge underworld. She's well known enough. Man, I really should have ranks at Underworld.

SPEAKER_07 37:50

Uh two success to advantage.

SPEAKER_11 37:52

One advantage. I got one failure.

SPEAKER_04 37:55

Okay, four success and one threat. Okay.

SPEAKER_11 37:58

Oh shit.

SPEAKER_01 37:58

So, uh, Chris and Illyria, you've heard of Aurusing. Um, Chris, since you got that threat, you've heard a lot of like rumors that may or may not be true. You know she's a pretty uh powerful bounty hunter. Like, you've heard that like so I through the grapevine, you've heard that there's this uh this Django Fett, who is the father of the clones, and you kind of have heard here and there that like Django Fett had like a kid, and like most people think that the kid is a clone, but you've heard that like Aura Singh might be that kid's mom. Oh I don't know if that's true though. Uh Illyria, you got uh Success and Advantage. Illyria, you're more kind of familiar with like you you've maybe even heard of Aura Singh that, like, oh, it's rumored that she did used to be a Jedi at one point. Uh, but the details of that are a little bit uh sketchy. So you can you can kind of have an idea of she is a pretty famous bounty hunter. You may have seen on the news that she was recently kind of arrested for an attempted assassination against the senator from Naboo. So she's so she's a pretty pretty dangerous individual. Starzan, um, you you don't really know about her, but it's like in the hologram you can see he has red she has like like red hair in like this ponytail top knot. Cala has red hair, maybe they're related. Oh my god.

SPEAKER_09 39:31

It's all conspiracy. Wait a minute. So does Bon Mothma.

SPEAKER_11 39:34

Oh my god. They're all related. All redheads are related.

SPEAKER_09 39:39

Was Bryce Dallas Howard ever on screen in Star Wars? Well she was Yattle. Yattle's a redhead.

SPEAKER_01 39:44

There you go. So you so you've all heard kind of bits and pieces about this bounty hunter. But Gray says, uh, well, yeah, you're right, she was uh recently arrested for attempting to assassinate a senator, so she's uh currently serving a hefty sentence down at central detention. But as uh the last person we know of who was close to Kiro, she may know if there's some way to find her. So we've been pre-approved to loan her out, provided she's tightly supervised and equipped with um any countermeasures should she try to escape. What uh what kind of countermeasures? Uh bomb in the neck.

SPEAKER_06 40:28

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_04 40:30

Are you saying that she's a part of some kind of suicide squad?

SPEAKER_01 40:34

Well, I'd hope not. Uh I'd like everybody to come back alive. Who don't we all?

SPEAKER_04 40:40

Yes, but what we need and what we want uh often differ.

SPEAKER_01 40:44

So uh if you guys would be willing, I'd like you to head down to Central Detention, talk to Singh, see if uh she'll tell you anything about Kiro's whereabouts, and if uh the situation heads that way, uh could use her as a guide. And if uh she does act up, he slides a little remote across your coffee table. Feel free to use that.

SPEAKER_04 41:04

This is the darkest thing. Well, no, we've been a part of many dark things before.

SPEAKER_10 41:09

Yeah, we've dealt with some shit. Okay, let's head down to Central Detention and chat with uh this this aura, Aura Sing.

SPEAKER_01 41:16

Do you want uh Grey to give you a ride, or are you gonna take your own take a taxi?

SPEAKER_11 41:20

I mean, I guess we get Grey to give us a ride. We don't have our own speeder, do we? Trying to remember if we do.

SPEAKER_01 41:26

Because you could you could have the uh the questing quail. You could take that over there as well if you're anticipating having to go on a jaunt.

SPEAKER_00 41:33

Is that small enough that we could take it like I mean on Coruscant?

SPEAKER_11 41:37

Yeah, it's like it's a shuttle. Okay, well let's just take the questing quail over there.

SPEAKER_01 41:42

We can take the questing quail over to the uh Republic's central detention facility. Alrighty. And it's this big uh spire kinda sticking up the sort of mushroom in the middle of the city. And as you uh enter, you can see that like a lot of the prison itself is sort of devoted to all of these like energy cells that are around the outside, the inside wall of this spire, with like a Panopticon tower in the middle, just sort of watching all of these individual cells. And as you guys are sort of standing there and and and waiting, you can sort of watch the little uh little transport platform go up to one of the cells, the field deactivates, and Or Singh is loaded onto the platform by a couple of guards, and it zips down and takes her to a an interrogation room where you can meet with her. You can see through the two-way mirror that something is injected into her neck, and the little device Gray gives you lights up with a green light. Uh and they uh the guards bring her in, they cuff her to the table, and then they give you the all clear that you can enter.

SPEAKER_11 43:03

Alrighty, let's let's enter.

SPEAKER_01 43:05

You can enter. Um, and Cala, you can feel her like staring daggers at you. Just like Hello? That's my gun.

SPEAKER_10 43:15

God damn it, I knew that I fucking called it.

SPEAKER_04 43:17

I fucking called it. Fuck uh, do you see you she did call it? She was uh curious about the person who bought uh who she bought the gun from, but uh uh now we know. That's good, that's good. What did you do to it?

SPEAKER_11 43:31

What did I do to it? I bought it. I bought a fair and square from a weapons deal, I put some modifications on it.

SPEAKER_01 43:37

Well, you you break it, you bought it, I guess. What it what is this about? What are you here for?

SPEAKER_02 43:42

She that's exactly right. She did buy it, yes.

SPEAKER_10 43:45

Listen, we hear about your old master. We we uh Which one the seeker.

SPEAKER_01 43:50

And she doesn't say anything for a while. And she j and sh you can tell that like she's sort of like reliving a lot of stuff in her head, trying to figure out why you guys are there, why you're asking her. About that, why you have her rifle. Like the pieces in her mind aren't really connecting.

SPEAKER_11 44:05

You uh need us to fill in any holes there? You look like you kinda gone to a different dimension.

SPEAKER_01 44:11

Yeah, uh, I'm a little confused. W who are you exactly?

SPEAKER_04 44:16

Uh, we are here to uh uh make sure that everything go uh goes smoothly and apparently there What is everything? Uh what does our mission again do?

SPEAKER_11 44:26

We had to find your old master, the seeker, because uh we think that after she went into exile because she thought you were dead and clearly incorrect, she might have continued to recruit a Jedi that never made the way to the Jedi Order. And we heard on some authority that you might be the last one who would be aware of her whereabouts.

SPEAKER_01 44:48

Is that the story that she thought I was dead?

SPEAKER_11 44:51

Uh apparently. Went to exile because of it. Why? Is d does she uh not think that you're dead? Is there something else that we need to be filling in?

SPEAKER_01 44:59

When I was nine years old, I was captured by pirates. She abandoned me on Narshidah.

SPEAKER_11 45:05

Was this before or after she thought you were dead?

SPEAKER_01 45:08

They told me that she sold me to them as a slave.

SPEAKER_11 45:11

Uh, I mean that does seem like uh a lie that someone might tell you to make you give up on hope of going back to an old life.

SPEAKER_10 45:19

Maybe true, I don't know. I don't know with that well.

SPEAKER_01 45:21

Neither did I, but um nobody becomes her padawan unless you're a problem student.

SPEAKER_11 45:28

Well, what does that mean?

SPEAKER_01 45:30

Do does that explain you, or Well, my mom was a spice addict that uh got passed on to me, and uh I had a pretty rough time of it with the Jedi. I'm sure that they told you all about that. I used to be a member of the Order.

SPEAKER_11 45:45

I mean uh come yeah, mom be a spice spice addict. That's not you know, babies recover from that very nicely, so I've heard.

SPEAKER_01 45:53

Yeah, they foisted me on Kiro. She abandoned me on Narcidah when I was nine. I didn't escape until I was fifteen. Oh, uh. I'll spare you the details, but uh a young girl for six years in the clutches of the worst men in the universe, uh.

SPEAKER_11 46:09

Oh Jesus, Murphy! Goddamn, okay shit. I don't even know what to say to that.

unknown 46:16

Fuck.

SPEAKER_04 46:17

That that's a lot that's a lot. That's a lot to uh uh get into here.

SPEAKER_02 46:22

And it sounds like uh she's been up to her old tricks. That's why we have you here, so is that you can uh help us uh make sure that she's not tricking evilly. So you're Jedi hunters.

SPEAKER_11 46:38

Uh we've been called that.

SPEAKER_04 46:39

I have c been called worse by better.

SPEAKER_11 46:42

You know, we're the Inquisition Division. We just like to make sure that everyone's uh acting within the lane.

SPEAKER_01 46:48

Well, Kuro uh went pretty far beyond her lane.

SPEAKER_11 46:52

You wanna elaborate on that, or just like uh you mean the selling you into slavery according to the slavers thing?

SPEAKER_01 47:00

She was uh not a uh nice master. There's a r there's a reason they gave me to her. There's a reason that uh she only trains the uh the tough cases.

SPEAKER_10 47:10

Wait.

SPEAKER_01 47:11

Because she's a tough girl?

SPEAKER_11 47:12

Hold up, does she okay, does she does she uh I don't want to say snatch. Did she recruit you initially when you're like, you know, a little pipsqueak?

SPEAKER_01 47:20

Yeah, uh she brought me to Coruscant. I was supposed to uh be under the tutelage of uh Kiatty Mundy, but uh apparently I was too much for him, so they gave me back to the dark woman.

SPEAKER_11 47:31

The dar Wait a second, was her whole thing just going after like Spice Head's kids? That was that a thing? Cause like, you know, I'm not I'm not saying our situations are comparable, but you know, like, you know, my pants, they ballasaws, you know, there's we dabble. We dabble. You dabble. We imbibe. I okay, look. We imbibe, I y it's a cultural thing, but also like a social thing. It's a whole thing. Not all ballasaws, but also a lot of ballasaws, you know.

SPEAKER_01 48:00

Look, she probably found a lot of kids. You ever hear of Asherod Hat?

SPEAKER_11 48:04

Have we? I don't know if we read have. I recognize that name, but I think that might be from a previous campaign.

SPEAKER_01 48:10

So give me a probably a Knowledge Core Worlds or Knowledge Lore three purple.

SPEAKER_11 48:17

Pretty sure those are both the same for me. Three purple?

SPEAKER_01 48:20

Yeah.

SPEAKER_11 48:20

Haha, three threat.

SPEAKER_01 48:22

Hell yeah.

SPEAKER_11 48:23

I know Jack shit.

SPEAKER_01 48:24

Yeah, you don't know who that is.

SPEAKER_11 48:26

Yeah, I don't know who that is.

SPEAKER_01 48:27

He says, yeah, he was a Tuscan kid from Tatooine. Another one of her boys, uh John Antilles, gave up his name. She convinced him to go so deep into the force he gave up his entire identity.

SPEAKER_11 48:39

And you uh you you you called her the Dark the Dark Lady?

SPEAKER_01 48:43

The Dark Woman, that's uh The Dark Woman? That was the nickname the kids at the temple had for because she was such a hard ass.

SPEAKER_11 48:50

Oh wow. Kinda glad she was gone before I uh actually, would she have been gone before my time?

SPEAKER_01 48:55

I mean if she found you.

SPEAKER_11 48:57

If she found me, would I have been at the temple?

SPEAKER_00 48:59

You wouldn't have been more than like four or five, probably.

SPEAKER_11 49:02

When she dicked off. Okay. So yeah, she uh I I would not have learned about her in any meaningful way, probably.

SPEAKER_07 49:09

I just know that Space Spear wrote some sonnets about her. The dark woman. The dark lady.

SPEAKER_01 49:22

Well, I hope you guys are laughing it up because uh I'm uh not exactly happy to be revisiting this chapter of my life.

SPEAKER_11 49:28

Yeah, no, can't blame ya. Can't blame you for that. Listen, you know, you gotta laugh or you gotta cry, and one's better than the other.

SPEAKER_01 49:36

She has this like antenna sticking out of her head, and she points to it and she says, uh, I don't cry no more thanks to this.

SPEAKER_11 49:44

Well, God, Orising, if you keep telling me more of your backstory like this, I just might start.

SPEAKER_01 49:50

So what do you want from me?

SPEAKER_11 49:52

We we want you to help us track this lady down. See what she's been doing with the uh the other Jedi kid she's been recruiting. See what's been going on. What other people?

SPEAKER_07 50:00

Apparently now she uh has not been bringing them back to Coruscant. Oh, she's just been taking them.

SPEAKER_11 50:05

Yeah, since she went into exile.

SPEAKER_04 50:07

Is is there a place maybe where she's been taken. Ooh, she sold you? What did she sell you? We'll start we could start Zah. Okay.

SPEAKER_11 50:18

Do you do you think she'd still be around Nashadar? Like bringing kids there to sell them off to slavers?

SPEAKER_01 50:24

She kind of thinks about this for a sec. Uh why don't you give me a charm just to see if how how much she'll go along with this? Ooh. Can Chris take that? Should I take it? Well, it's a charm. Who's the most charming?

SPEAKER_11 50:38

Okay. Can Chris take it? Fair enough. Alright, what kind of charm?

SPEAKER_01 50:42

Uh this will be against her cool, so that'll be against two reds and three purples. Holy shot.

SPEAKER_03 50:48

Uh how many uh uh Destiny points we got?

SPEAKER_01 50:51

Uh you have two.

SPEAKER_03 50:54

I'll just roll.

SPEAKER_04 50:55

Uh three success and four threat.

unknown 50:58

Ooh!

SPEAKER_01 50:59

And she s she kind of mulls it over, and she says, I think I might know where we could find her, but I want you guys to make me a promise.

SPEAKER_04 51:07

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 51:08

Uh what's kind of promise? That when we get there, I'm the one to kill her.

SPEAKER_04 51:13

Is our goal to kill her? I don't think our goal is to kill her.

SPEAKER_11 51:16

Well, what if it what if we get there and it turns out that it's like it's all been a big misunderstanding, and it was actually, you know, again, the slavers just lied to you, as slavers might be wont to do. Jesus! How many of these kids did she steal? 13.

SPEAKER_01 51:31

You really want 13 of me running around? You seem charming enough.

SPEAKER_11 51:35

Come on, that's also me. I don't know if you want 13 of me running around, but like maybe she's has good intentions for these kids. How about if it if it's like, okay, the situation is exactly what it looks like. She has been selling kids, she's a bitch. Then yeah, if she needs to be put down, you can absolutely be the one to put her down.

SPEAKER_01 51:56

I feel as though, like Well, that's not what I'm asking for. You want the information, you gotta promise me that when we find her, I'm the one to kill her.

SPEAKER_11 52:04

What's it gonna take to argue you down to listen to a first?

SPEAKER_00 52:08

I mean, you could lie to her potentially.

SPEAKER_11 52:10

Uh, but that feels I feel weird about lying to her. I feel a kinship with her.

SPEAKER_04 52:17

I mean, yeah, but also we have a controller with a drug. What does red hair have to do with anything?

SPEAKER_11 52:27

The fact that Eden was telling me about Aura Singh and this the shit about her backstory, and I'm like, fuck, if we have any savvy listeners, they're gonna think I ripped her off on purpose. I didn't. I didn't realize. I wasn't even thinking about it. I'm Natasha Leon, knockoff.

SPEAKER_01 52:43

Oh, uh Aura Singh in canon, one of her nicknames was Nashta.

SPEAKER_11 52:49

I'm telling you I didn't do this on purpose. Yes, I feel weird about lying to her. I feel a certain connection to her for reasons I cannot fully articulate.

SPEAKER_09 53:00

This is what it's like when doves cry.

SPEAKER_11 53:04

I'm crying.

SPEAKER_09 53:05

I thought I was the only no-house.

SPEAKER_11 53:08

I'm crying here.

SPEAKER_09 53:10

No, all too well.

SPEAKER_01 53:11

I'm crying here.

SPEAKER_11 53:12

I'm crying here.

SPEAKER_01 53:14

Well, I mean you got fourth threat on your charm roll. Th these are her terms.

SPEAKER_11 53:19

Uh uh. Fine. I don't like crying.

SPEAKER_04 53:26

Uh listen. Uh you you can you can c uh you can come with us and uh we will uh we will lead you to her.

SPEAKER_01 53:34

I think you've got it backwards. I'm gonna lead you to her. You're not finding her without me.

SPEAKER_04 53:40

Alright, well I think I think we'll let you uh we'll let you kill her then if we need if we need to kill her.

SPEAKER_01 53:46

Is are are you making this uh promise honestly or are you lying, Chris?

SPEAKER_02 53:52

Um, yeah, I'm probably lying. Right, roll me a deception then. Okay, fine. Uh this will be against two reds, two purples. Two reds, two purples. I'm gonna flip a destiny on this one.

SPEAKER_11 54:04

Did you want me to try to take this one? Uh you don't want to lie. I don't want to lie to her.

SPEAKER_01 54:10

Yeah, you'll have some additional penalties because you don't want to lie to her. Okay.

SPEAKER_04 54:13

Uh well, I did get uh a failure and four advantage.

SPEAKER_01 54:19

Ooh. You can you can say that, like, yeah, we'll we'll let you kill her. Um and she says, alright, uh, then we have a deal. But you know who I am, and uh just keep that in mind if you decide to break it. She can tell that you're lying. She's willing to go with you. Hopefully, uh, she's she's hoping that maybe you will uh keep your word. She knows that she got injected with something in the back of her neck. She may lash out if she suspects you of uh trying to blow her up.

SPEAKER_04 54:50

Yeah, who has the remote by the way, and who wants to keep it?

SPEAKER_01 54:53

Yeah, who wants the remote?

SPEAKER_04 54:55

It is not I. I think it should. I think I I think it should be the most just one responsibility.

SPEAKER_11 55:02

The most responsible uh I feel like it should be Illyria because I feel like she's gonna be the one who can who is the most capable of just like divorcing emotion from it and just like this is the correct time to do this. There is no emotion, there is peace.

SPEAKER_04 55:18

There's pieces. I also did put a finger on my nose and was looking at everybody else.

SPEAKER_01 55:24

Being aware that if you uh break your word that she will kill you, um she can be escorted from the interrogation room. Uh resupplied with the gear that was confiscated from her during her arrest, a pair of blasters, her signature orange bodysuit, and vest, not her blaster rifle, because you have, of course.

SPEAKER_11 55:52

Well, maybe she shouldn't have gotten caught, and then her gun wouldn't have ended up at that weapon stealer. It's mine, I modified it. Find his keepas.

SPEAKER_04 56:00

That's true. She did pay for it, and she did find her keeper. It she also licked it after.

SPEAKER_11 56:05

Yeah, I slurped it up. Not the barrel end, I'm not that dumb.

SPEAKER_04 56:09

I'm I'm not that sad.

SPEAKER_11 56:11

I'm not that sad. Not yet.

SPEAKER_02 56:14

She's like, give it time. It remains to be seen.

SPEAKER_11 56:18

Jesus, okay, shit. But uh Your real ray of sunshine, Aura. Anyone ever tell you that? Hey, I can be nice. When?

SPEAKER_01 56:27

When I have to do it.

SPEAKER_11 56:28

When you're gonna start.

SPEAKER_01 56:30

Look, I'm gonna be a lot happier once uh Kiro's taken care of.

SPEAKER_04 56:34

Okay, we're gonna go take care of her. Let's go, let's go find your woman of honor.

SPEAKER_01 56:39

So you can lead her to the questing quail, and she uh says, this is a pretty nice ship. You're not gonna try to steal this, are you? What, this thing? No, it's probably lo loaded down with tracking devices, listing devices, anything you can imagine. They probably got you guys in a pretty tight leash, huh?

SPEAKER_04 56:55

We've been trying to find Zem. Do you know where they might hide them?

SPEAKER_11 56:58

Actually, did we ever check for listening devices on the Questing Quail? Because we checked our apartment. We found most of the ones in the custodannet, if not all of them.

SPEAKER_01 57:06

I feel like if uh you it would have been rolled into the same thing. Like if you had found any uh in your apartment, you probably also would have checked the the quest and quail if you had a chance.

SPEAKER_11 57:18

Look, we checked it. We probably found them. Found a lot of bed bugs.

SPEAKER_00 57:23

In here?

SPEAKER_11 57:24

Yeah. I mean well, they're they're done. We got rid of them. Don't worry about it, but you know, like they're gone. They were here, now they're not. We found the bugs. Haha. See the bugs.

SPEAKER_07 57:34

Why would someone put free couch on a couch on the street if it had bed bugs in it? Why wouldn't they just take it to the dump?

SPEAKER_11 57:41

All that was there was a sign that said B boo gees.

SPEAKER_08 57:45

B boo gees.

SPEAKER_00 57:47

They got real bad kerning on their penmanship. Oh, I'm glad the Republicans.

SPEAKER_06 57:51

Oh, sorry, it said free bugs.

SPEAKER_01 57:54

Free bugs.

SPEAKER_11 57:55

You're like, hell yeah, bugs.

SPEAKER_01 57:59

So which one of you is the uh navigator?

SPEAKER_07 58:01

Uh, that would be me.

SPEAKER_01 58:03

Alright. Why don't you uh put in a course the fifth planet in the Caphrin system?

SPEAKER_07 58:08

Will do.

SPEAKER_01 58:09

The uh three purple astrogation.

SPEAKER_05 58:12

What advantage?

SPEAKER_01 58:13

One advantage. So you can put it in, um, but it brings up a warning saying uh that the planet is heavily irradiated.

SPEAKER_04 58:22

Ooh.

SPEAKER_07 58:23

Uh, are you sure about this?

SPEAKER_01 58:25

Pretty sure. Uh Caphrin 5 was where the Dark Woman used to take me for training. It was uh an isolated place. Apparently, uh planets in that area were heavily irradiated by a solar storm or something in the long time ago. Kept it off the Republic's radar. But uh by the time we got there, radiation had subsided enough to make the place livable. Seems like nobody's bothered updating the charts since then.

SPEAKER_11 58:54

She lying.

SPEAKER_07 58:55

She lying. How many teeth does she have? Is your skin melting off?

SPEAKER_11 59:00

You lying, ma'am.

SPEAKER_00 59:02

Um, this would probably be Is Yo appent on it.

SPEAKER_11 59:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 59:06

Uh two red and three purple.

SPEAKER_11 59:08

Two red, three purple, that'd be perception.

SPEAKER_02 59:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_11 59:12

Well, I got three yellow. Interesting.

SPEAKER_00 59:15

Three threats and a triumph. You can't tell whether or not she's lying. Like, why do you think she would be lying?

SPEAKER_11 59:22

Maybe she's trying to trick us into going there so we go down to the planet and we all fucking die of radiation. Maybe she has maybe she's radiation resistant, and she knows that we are not.

SPEAKER_01 59:32

Uh well, so Aurasing is not human. Um, she is near human, humanoid. She's a Paladuven. She's uh got this kind of chalk white skin, really long fingers. But aside from that, like, as far as you guys know, Paladuvans don't have any sort of resistance to radiation. Um, she seems to have like a computer in her brain. That probably wouldn't help with radiation. You know what, that's true. Yeah, with that, try if you can tell that, like, she wants to go. You can kind of get a sense that she's she's wanting to go there. She's driven to go there. It's not like a, hey, here's a place I know where we can hide it. Like, this is somewhere where it's like We must go. Yeah, like this is clicked for her.

SPEAKER_11 1:00:22

Okay. Radiation planet it is, I guess.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:25

Yeah, however, there is still you got that triumph and threat, so although she is kind of uh locked into this, she is still a bounty hunter. She is still like pretty, pretty tricky. She is pretty notorious, she is pretty, pretty powerful as far as bounty hunters go. There there may be more to it. You may want to keep on guard, but you can't tell either way. Okay. I guess let's go along with it. Seems trustworthy. So why don't you re-roll that astrogation? You can ignore the warning, add a blue onto that. Illyria.

SPEAKER_07 1:00:56

One success, two threat.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:58

Not success, still. So uh you can plot a course. Now, you got those threat. This is in the ash worlds, which is the uh the area of space that was supposedly racked by these solar storms, or supernova, or whatever it is that uh caused this area of space to become heavily irradiated. It is in the outer rim. About those two threats, so you will have a lot of time alone in a tin can with a bounty hunter who's uh killed Jedi who were much more powerful than you four. So how you doing? How ya feelin'?

SPEAKER_11 1:01:39

Well, it'll be fine. We just gotta hide whenever we need to. It's fine, we can just make some conversation. So what's uh what's it like having an antenna in your head, Aura Singh?

SPEAKER_01 1:01:50

Well, it keeps me from dreaming.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:52

Oh, that's dark. What your life is so dark, you need to party with me once in a while. Tell you what, after we let you kill that woman, we're gonna get you uh we're gonna make sure that you have some fun, okay?

SPEAKER_11 1:02:04

I mean too i you know, Chrissy is very good at helping people have fun. He's like, you wanna party, you wanna have a good time, you call Chris Aunt.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:12

Listen, I'm very I'm very good at making sure that it is not even if you want don't want to party, making sure that you are uh having the ti a good time.

SPEAKER_09 1:02:22

They call him the fun doctor. The fun doctor. Like a con like a conductor, but uh fun? A fun doctor?

SPEAKER_00 1:02:30

Yeah.

SPEAKER_09 1:02:30

Oh, that is good.

SPEAKER_00 1:02:32

The funnest doctor around.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:34

So which one of you has the remote to the bomb in my brain?

SPEAKER_10 1:02:37

Why?

SPEAKER_01 1:02:38

Well, I just want to uh know who to look in the eyes if you decide to blow my skull apart.

SPEAKER_11 1:02:44

I uh I feel like when you say it's the person you wanna look in the eyes, it's the person you're gonna want to try to kill first to get the remote away, so I don't think we're gonna tell you that, Aura. Respectfully.

SPEAKER_07 1:02:54

I will continue to fiddle with knobs.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:56

Let's let's see if I can figure it out.

SPEAKER_11 1:02:58

I mean, no one can stop no one can stop you from trying to figure it out.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:03

Okay, so she's gonna roll her perception against each of your cool.

SPEAKER_09 1:03:07

Turns into trying with every muscle in his body to seem like chill and relaxed. Uh so cool.

SPEAKER_11 1:03:13

Oh no, Illyria, your presence.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:16

Crystal. I have a rank. What is your cool?

SPEAKER_11 1:03:18

I have two ranks.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:20

I have four green. Okay, so that's that's against four purple. That's pretty good. So, uh, she's gonna roll her perception. Now she rolled two failures and one advantage.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:33

Oh. So it's gonna give her a blue for the next one?

SPEAKER_01 1:03:37

You can feel, you can kind of see just softly, uh, here, like really, really quietly, this little computer in her brain ticking away. Hey, that's cheating. It's not cheating. It allows her to add uh success to perception and vigilance checks. Uh just one though, so not enough. So she still gets failure with advantage. So she can't tell if it's Chris, but she could get that as that advantage. So she kind of maybe has a hunch that it's not him. Uh Kala, what is your cool?

SPEAKER_00 1:04:09

Uh, too green. Okay. Two success and a threat.

SPEAKER_11 1:04:13

She could tell it wasn't me, and she was really hoping that it was, because then she could kill me and take the gun back.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:20

She was looking for an excuse. Starzan. Too green. Three success and an advantage. She's uh she can tell you don't have it, and she's kinda happy she won't have to wrestle it out of your hands.

SPEAKER_07 1:04:31

You mean out of his undies? She can tell he doesn't have it because he doesn't have any clothes on.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:37

Where would we even keep it? And Illyria.

SPEAKER_07 1:04:41

Uh one yellow, one green.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:42

Okay.

SPEAKER_07 1:04:43

That's with two ranks. Sad.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:46

Three advantages. Ooh. But her computer gives her a success.

SPEAKER_04 1:04:51

Oh fuck.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:53

So Illyria, you're fiddling with knobs that don't do anything, flipping switches back and forth uh in a very suspicious manner manner. So yeah, you you're you're really trying to avoid her gaze, and she just kind of says, okay, okay.

SPEAKER_07 1:05:11

Okay. I avoid eye contact.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:13

You can uh non-suspiciously avoid eye contact.

SPEAKER_11 1:05:16

I just, you know, just remember you try to kill any of us to get that thing back, you still gotta deal with the other three.

SPEAKER_04 1:05:24

Hey, let's not threaten everybody. Let's have a good time while we go and find her master. I wanna have a good time.

SPEAKER_11 1:05:30

I'm trying to I was trying to tell her about how Chris is gonna having a good time. How can I have a good time? Look Aura saying, I feel like we're not that different.

SPEAKER_04 1:05:39

Like, are you just immune to having a good time? Nobody should be immune to having a good time. Or everybody should have a good time. You should be immune to having a bad time.

SPEAKER_11 1:05:50

Well, let's not go that far. That's going to like lobotomy territory, but you know. You understand what he's trying to say. I understand.

SPEAKER_04 1:05:58

I start thinking about my past. Is that why I have good time? Do I have lobotomy? Have I had a lobotomy?

SPEAKER_01 1:06:05

Maybe when all this is over we can have a good time together and we can celebrate with a round on me.

SPEAKER_04 1:06:10

You know, once we see it.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:12

Why does that sound threatening when she says it? She says it in a way that's like very clearly she's not expecting to go back to prison.

SPEAKER_04 1:06:20

And honestly, depending on how uh on how you treat this situ uh situation, I'm very much okay with just l you know, you just got to wa uh you she just got away from us, you know, and it's kind of that kind of thing.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:33

I mean, canonically she did appear uh like her uh trying to assassinate the senator from Naboo happened in an episode of the Clone Wars. She was sent to jail, and then she appeared later on in the timeline, mysteriously out of jail. It's true. It is thus far unexplained how she got there.

SPEAKER_04 1:06:51

Maybe I can charm her uh charm our way into making sure that she, you know, she befriends us instead of be enemies us.

SPEAKER_00 1:06:59

Be enemies us? Yes.

SPEAKER_11 1:07:02

What is the opposite of befriending someone? Be enemies. I guess he said it the first time.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:12

Are you gonna are you gonna try and get on her good side?

SPEAKER_04 1:07:15

I'd be like, I kinda want to. I want to get on everybody's good side, so I think I want to get on her good side, you know?

SPEAKER_11 1:07:21

I feel like this is gonna go a lot more smoothly if we don't have to worry about her trying to fucking kill Elyria as soon as one of us turns our backs.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:29

Yeah, so c getting getting to know her uh during the trip might be, especially if depending on how long it takes for things to pop off when you get there.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:37

Yeah, let's get to know her. Let's be friends! So, uh, how did you how did you get caught?

SPEAKER_01 1:07:43

Look, you guys are Jedi, right?

SPEAKER_00 1:07:46

Ish. I mean you got laser swords. Ish, you know. You know how it is.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:51

We're we're we're barely good at what we do.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:54

Look, it's a little embarrassing, but um, it's this frickin' kid, man.

SPEAKER_04 1:08:00

Ooh, what kind of kid?

SPEAKER_01 1:08:01

Uh well, there's this uh this Jedi uh wait, no, it wouldn't be. Maybe? What?

SPEAKER_04 1:08:09

Is it? She's having she's having a conversation with herself. Let's let her let's let her uh find herself.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:16

So I was uh I was on Tatooine like uh about ten years back. Um doesn't matter why.

SPEAKER_06 1:08:23

Uh okay.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:26

Let's just go with that. I was there at the uh this uh big pod race and this little freaking human kid wins the whole thing. Name is Skywalker.

SPEAKER_11 1:08:35

Uh fucking Skywalker.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:36

Yeah, and there's that this this Jedi who was uh hanging around when I tried to off that senator. Um his little his little sidekick, she actually was the one who got the better of me, which is embarrassing. She must be like what, 13, 14?

SPEAKER_11 1:08:53

Skywalker sidekick.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:55

Yeah. I never put it together that that was the same kid. Same guy. Wait, they let him into the Jedi? He was like he was like a like a guy. Way too old.

SPEAKER_04 1:09:05

What what what what do you what do you mean?

SPEAKER_01 1:09:06

You never let would've let me in if I was any older.

SPEAKER_11 1:09:09

Nah, you wouldn't have let any of us in if we are any older. Oh, Z. Fucking bullshit, isn't it? I know.

SPEAKER_09 1:09:14

Like Star Starzan, who was like actually pretty old when he joined his.

SPEAKER_04 1:09:18

And you're like, oh man! Apparently they thought that he was uh No wait, we do how how much do we know about him? Do we know about him a bunch? I mean, there is probably a lot of.

SPEAKER_01 1:09:30

Yeah, there's there's like shit gets out.

SPEAKER_04 1:09:33

Apparently some people chose him. Must have been in some sort of lottery or something, I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 1:09:38

What uh what I do know is I mean when uh when I saw him in that race, he was a uh slave. Slave to a junk dealer, I think.

SPEAKER_04 1:09:47

What uh kind of drug dealer? Or what kind of slave dealer?

SPEAKER_01 1:09:51

What a just a just a I don't know, some some freaky little character, but it's uh interesting you went from being a slave to uh to that guy to a slave to the Jedi, huh?

SPEAKER_11 1:10:01

I guess it is kind of funny if you think about it in those terms. Like not funny, haha, but a little funny ha ha.

SPEAKER_02 1:10:08

Funny peculiar?

SPEAKER_11 1:10:09

Funny, uh bemusing. It's bemusing.

SPEAKER_02 1:10:13

It is bemusing.

SPEAKER_01 1:10:14

Does it feel good to be bemused, doesn't it? As she's talking, she kinda she has these like long arms and these long fingers and just kinda like reaches under her seat. And you can see that she's like almost like tapping under the seat as she's talking to you. And then she stops and you hear this like little scratch and this little pop, and she holds she's holding between like her thumb and her middle finger a little like listening device.

SPEAKER_11 1:10:38

Ah, damn, I knew we must have missed one. Or several, perhaps.

SPEAKER_01 1:10:42

And she kinda she she crushes it in her hand. And she says, yeah, I mean, Jedi stuff isn't really for everyone. Can make a lot of money hunting bounties. Can make a lot of money hunting Jedi.

SPEAKER_04 1:10:56

We do make uh we we we do uh every once in a while get room and board, which is nice.

SPEAKER_11 1:11:02

I mean, we get uh, you know, definitely get more money hunting Jedi than we had working for them in the service core. Not that we're hunting Jedi, that does sound like so, you know, icky, but you know. I mean it is what it is.

SPEAKER_04 1:11:17

In a sense we do hunt Jedi, we just uh We're monitoring Jedi, not hunting. We're more bounty bounty hunters than we are, uh oh my god, we're bounty hunters, that is so cool.

SPEAKER_01 1:11:29

Do you get a bounty?

SPEAKER_11 1:11:31

I mean we get a stipend.

SPEAKER_01 1:11:33

Stipend.

SPEAKER_11 1:11:34

Listen, you know, it's still better than what we were getting when we're in the service core. I know it's probably not bounty hunter money, but like, you know, you don't knock it.

SPEAKER_04 1:11:42

Also, don't judge us. We're still we're still st trying to figure out our place in this universe, so we're d so.

SPEAKER_01 1:11:49

You know, just a lightsaber alone goes for 10,000 on the black market.

SPEAKER_11 1:11:55

Well, maybe when we're all done, maybe when we're gray we'll get rid of our lightsabers. But for now I think we're all uh wanting to keep 'em. It took us a while just to get 'em back in the first place. Yeah, but now you have 'em. Well yeah, now we have 'em. Doesn't mean we want to get rid of them immediately.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:11

Well, you don't have to get rid of 'em. I'm I'm not saying you should sell yours, but I'm saying, you know, if you happen to get a hold of any others.

SPEAKER_11 1:12:19

Well, sure, if we happen to get a hold of any others.

SPEAKER_04 1:12:22

How many lightsabers have you sold?

SPEAKER_01 1:12:25

Sold uh three or four.

SPEAKER_04 1:12:26

Ooh. I assume you didn't find the lightsabers lying around.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:31

No, I did not.

SPEAKER_04 1:12:33

Uh, I really want to just be on her good side. I feel like being on her good side is where we should be.

SPEAKER_11 1:12:39

Well, look, if we come across any rogue lightsabers, then you know, we'll figure it out from there. Kallisette is being a little bit taken in by this, because it's like, oh, I do like money. Uh then.

SPEAKER_04 1:12:52

If we do find any lightsabers just lying around on the floors, then we can definitely sell it. We found one on lying on the floor once, right?

SPEAKER_11 1:13:00

I don't know if we have found one just lying on the floor. Although it's god, it has been a while since I've indulged myself. I've been doing real good with the meditation, you know, but like.

unknown 1:13:10

Do it.

SPEAKER_01 1:13:11

Oh yeah, meditation, that good old uh Jedi asceticism. Don't feel, don't be alive, don't uh care about your family.

SPEAKER_11 1:13:22

I mean, respectfully, or in my case it's more don't spend all your money on impact. It's uh you know, I a at a point it's kind of more just like fiscal strategy. Wouldn't it be nice to not have to worry about that? What, money? Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 1:13:37

We don't worry about money, they take care of us.

SPEAKER_01 1:13:39

Yeah, we have room apartments and uh stipend m Look, you four, you're all uh doing, I assume, uh bang up job investigating these Jedi who aren't following the rules, but what if they start changing the uh the rules on you? What if the stuff that used to be okay isn't anymore? They start sending you after other people? What happens when they change the rules enough that they come after you?

SPEAKER_04 1:14:07

Uh, then we uh fight back and run away, I guess.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:11

Yeah, but at that point it might be too late. The Republic's uh pretty big machine. Wouldn't it be nice to scurry out from under it before it's stepping on you?

SPEAKER_11 1:14:19

Well, yeah, but if we you know, the longer you wait, the longer you collect on what they have to offer. You know, it's just like money. But also, you know, a sense of purpose. I'm still we're still helping. We're making a contribution to society. Trying.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:37

Look, I'm not gonna knock you for uh taking government cheese to take down bad Jedi. Not that I don't know if there's such a thing as good Jedi.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:46

Um A A J A B.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:51

Look, the uh the Jedi work for the Senate. You think the Senate's uh good people? There's a reason there's a separatist movement, you know. Like you ever wonder why the Trade Federation has a seat in the Senate? They're a corporation, they don't represent anybody.

SPEAKER_04 1:15:06

There are a surprising amount of uh uh accusations going against Jedi. This is a bit of a uh how you say witch tri uh are you saying that this might become some kind of witch trial? Like a Deathomir witch?

SPEAKER_01 1:15:21

You just think oh my Dathimir witch.

SPEAKER_06 1:15:25

Thinking about your GF.

SPEAKER_04 1:15:27

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_11 1:15:29

My big titty Dathomir GF.

SPEAKER_04 1:15:32

Oh, she's got big titties too? Oh you haven't noticed until now.

SPEAKER_12 1:15:38

Now that you play the titties! I respect her as a woman, you see. I respect her for more than just her beautiful tits.

SPEAKER_09 1:15:46

See, but also beautiful tits. Chris doesn't see measurements. To him, everybody is a 36-2636.

SPEAKER_04 1:15:54

Every ever every every bra g comes off just as easily. There you go.

SPEAKER_01 1:15:58

Now I'm not uh asking you to do anything, but I'm just suggesting, you know, after we deal with Kiro, uh we right the wrongs that she did. You don't have to go back.

SPEAKER_04 1:16:08

Hmm. This feels like some kind of uh uh what what where do you suggest we go?

SPEAKER_00 1:16:15

Am I being seduced right now? Hey, I I know a lot of people. Who do you know?

SPEAKER_01 1:16:21

Well, I've dealt with the huts from time to time. I could get some uh work on Cad Bane's crew, I uh no Bosque, you know. There's a lot of uh a lot of work out there for people like us, especially if we're uh people who don't have a problem taking down Jedi.

SPEAKER_11 1:16:38

I mean look, like we're still like, you know, we're not totally like that.

SPEAKER_04 1:16:46

I feel like Kaliset's like, we're still good people, we're law-abiding citizens, but she's also like if all of a sudden she just took out the uh the box and just like poop.

SPEAKER_11 1:17:00

Uh it's like you gotta die. Let's say that's enough with our crazy talk. Let's let's just keep let's go, I'll just deal with her and then we'll figure things out from there.

SPEAKER_01 1:17:09

Like I said, I'm not asking you to do anything. I'm just uh we're just having a friendly conversation.

SPEAKER_11 1:17:14

Yeah, we're having a friendly conversation. Now let's have some friendly silence.

SPEAKER_01 1:17:17

So you could sit in silence for the remainder of the trip.

SPEAKER_11 1:17:23

This is much better.

SPEAKER_01 1:17:25

Until you get to Caphrygen 5. So from space, it uh doesn't seem to be heavily irradiated. It does look like somewhere where a Jedi would go for training. A lot of uh forested mountains and grassy plains, and or it can kind of guide you towards uh what appears to be the ruins of an ancient city belonging to some long forgotten civilization. She says, there that's where the Dark Woman used to take me to train.

SPEAKER_11 1:18:00

What does it look like?

SPEAKER_01 1:18:02

You can see in sort of the the dim evening light, there are a couple of like flickers of like fire down there.

SPEAKER_11 1:18:12

Oh. Was there uh was anyone else living on this planet when she'd bring you here for training? No, that's why she brought me here.

SPEAKER_12 1:18:19

Hmm.

SPEAKER_00 1:18:21

Let's maybe park a little bit away from the fiery flickers so we can um investigate.

SPEAKER_01 1:18:27

Okay, so to to bring the ship down, uh, in a way that's not gonna attract attention where you can sneak in. That'll probably that would be against kind of the perception of probably the most perceptive person down there. Okay. Um you are coming down in a ship. It's pretty far away. I'll say you could add a blue onto this. Uh, but it will be against two reds and two purples.

SPEAKER_11 1:18:53

Two reds, two purples. Piloting space. We'll see.

SPEAKER_01 1:18:59

You do have a destiny point if you want to use one.

SPEAKER_11 1:19:01

Uh already rolled. One failure, one advantage. Okay, well, you I mean, you can bring the ship down.

SPEAKER_01 1:19:08

You think you were pretty stealthy.

SPEAKER_11 1:19:09

Yeah, that's probably fine. Probably good enough, right?

SPEAKER_01 1:19:12

Yeah, might just be a uh a flicker of the aurora that's uh in the night sky, kind of illuminating things periodically. Might be just a shooting star.

SPEAKER_11 1:19:22

Yeah, with nothing, with nothing. Don't even look up.

SPEAKER_01 1:19:25

Somebody somebody saw you, could be easily be misinterpreted. Okay, cool. Let's disembark. You can uh disembark. Sneak through the woods. It takes a little while to get there, because presumably you parked far away. A little takes long enough that uh dusk turns to night, and it becomes easier to see the firelight that's kind of been uh set up in the remains of this city. There is a a big uh fire pit that you can kind of see a few people mingling around uh without getting too close. You can't really identify any of them or kind of get any any sense other than that there are people around a fire in the ruins of the city. The fire seems to be kind of like built in sort of like a town square. So it is fairly out in the open.

SPEAKER_11 1:20:21

Are we getting forcey vibes from anyone, or like would that be a specific force power?

SPEAKER_00 1:20:25

Uh do you have sense? Does do any of you have sense? No, I have seek and suppress. I mean, you do have seek.

SPEAKER_11 1:20:33

I do have seek, so maybe I could seek her. Yeah. I'll roll seek to see if we can tell where this uh where the lady is. And I up my force rating. Haha. Ooh. Three dark side. Do I want to use the dark side? I mean, that's up to you. I know. She did snatch you. They did snatch me. But also, I might all be feeling like I need to be on my best behavior because Aurusing's trying to tempt me away from being a good person.

SPEAKER_01 1:21:03

Uh, why don't you give me that? What's your discipline? My discipline? Yeah, why don't you roll your discipline against itself?

SPEAKER_11 1:21:10

Um against itself, okay.

SPEAKER_01 1:21:12

Yeah, I'll give you you're kinda low on destiny points. I'll give you a destiny point here so we can uh let's downgrade one of your yellows.

SPEAKER_11 1:21:20

How rude. Okay. So it's three green against a red and two purple. Let's see. One failure. I gotta use that dark side. Okay, I'll spend the two dark side.

SPEAKER_01 1:21:33

So you can see uh a woman, looks to be in like her mid-60s, who is going around the fire. She's sort of ladling, it's it seems like soup or stew or some kind of broth into the cups of the people there. There there do seem to be like eight or so of them, and you don't even really notice as you're kind of surveying uh the scene here, that you are looking through the scope of your new rifle. Ah. Finger on the trick.

SPEAKER_11 1:22:09

I'll catch myself. I'm not gonna shoot her, but I'll kind of like uh nod in her direction, just like that's uh that's her.

SPEAKER_01 1:22:16

And she says, Yeah, that's that's her.

SPEAKER_11 1:22:19

She uh looking looking at the other people around the fire, because I'm guessing that these are the ones who are abducted, do any do they look nervous or like, you know, they are in distress or like they're just trying to be on their best behavior because they're scared of her?

SPEAKER_01 1:22:34

They don't look nervous or in distress. It seems like this like it's just the the usual evening meal. You can even you can you can even see them like uh like a couple of them are like chuckling, someone tells a joke and the other one laughs, and you can see the dark woman kind of glances back at them, not in a way that's like reprimanding, but like oh you boys kind of look.

SPEAKER_11 1:23:00

Yeah, and uh that's uh that's the dark woman.

SPEAKER_01 1:23:04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:23:04

She doesn't uh so far she doesn't seem that bad. What do what exactly did she do to you again to make her be so evil?

SPEAKER_01 1:23:11

Well, she sold me to pirates on Nar Shada.

SPEAKER_11 1:23:14

Again, according to the pirates.

SPEAKER_04 1:23:16

Why did she sell you to the pirates?

SPEAKER_01 1:23:19

To make money, to get rid of me? I don't know. She stole these kids though, we know that, right?

SPEAKER_11 1:23:24

Yeah, okay, but do they they don't especially look like then distress? And again, she sold you to pirates according to the pirates.

SPEAKER_01 1:23:31

You ever heard a Spockholm syndrome?

SPEAKER_11 1:23:34

Yeah. Yeah, have you? Have you?

SPEAKER_02 1:23:38

Spockholm syndrome? Yeah, I've heard of it, that's why I brought it up.

SPEAKER_11 1:23:42

Okay, because it really seems like it kind of put more blame on her for something that the pirates said that she did rather than the pirates who, like, honestly, I'm gonna level with you. I feel like they probably just kidnapped you. To be fair. Maybe she did sell you.

SPEAKER_07 1:23:55

I don't know, but like, you know, she doesn't really how long ago did this happen?

SPEAKER_11 1:24:00

It's like 20 years ago? Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 1:24:02

Wait, when we were told that she lost a child, I thought they meant that the that her Padawan died.

SPEAKER_01 1:24:10

Well, that's what she thought. So she went into exile, but then a few years like later, Aura Singh pops up as a bounty hunter and they realize, oh, I guess that kid didn't die. Yeah. So if she if she went into exile 20 years ago, like she probably doesn't if she thinks that Aura Singh died, uh, was killed by pirates, then she probably doesn't know that she's like a a living bounty hunter. Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 1:24:34

Hey, maybe she'll be happy to see you.

SPEAKER_11 1:24:36

Look, I'm just saying, she looks like, you know, maybe someone who would be open to talking if we wanted to talk to her. And like, look, if she tries to lie and say that she didn't sell you, like uh, Aura Singh's much more you can see through lies, can't ya? You'll be able to see through her lying to you. Do you remember the children? And you'll be able to see the truth. Yeah, I remember the promise, but like, you know, maybe delay the promise until after a quick conversation.

SPEAKER_01 1:25:02

Maybe a charm coercion, maybe a coercion.

SPEAKER_11 1:25:04

Oh god, I'm so bad at all of those. I guess coercion is technically better than charm. What would it be for coercion?

SPEAKER_01 1:25:12

So, uh, this will be against two reds, two purples.

SPEAKER_04 1:25:18

I I I truly I truly think that uh uh there's more going on and uh killing her won't solve your uh won't solve your problems.

SPEAKER_11 1:25:27

Yeah, Chris is being charming. Can he take the lead? Can he do a charm? I only got three green to coercion. Not a blue.

SPEAKER_04 1:25:34

Okay. There you go. You're fucking welcome.

SPEAKER_11 1:25:37

Thank you, craft. I'm gonna flip one. Should I downgrade a no, I'll get a yellow. Maybe I'll get a maybe I'll get a triumph. Who knows? Do I have anything else? I don't think I have anything else that can help me with coercion. Uh you know what? Let's just trust in the force. Do it. Two failures, one advantage. Fuck the force.

SPEAKER_01 1:25:59

And she says, I don't know or care if she's willing to talk.

SPEAKER_04 1:26:06

Are you ever willing are you ever willing to l uh to listen? You feel it feels as though uh you don't uh you just expect something of people and you don't actually know.

SPEAKER_11 1:26:18

Oh, let's put this another way, Aura. Cause like the youngest kid there, how how young did the youngest ones look?

SPEAKER_01 1:26:24

There there are eight of them that you can see, uh, and the youngest one seems to be about like eight.

SPEAKER_11 1:26:30

Okay, so the youngest kid there's eight, she appears to be primary caregiver. You shoot her, suddenly you're in the c you're in custody of a child? Do you really want that? You're gonna be responsible for a little kid.

SPEAKER_01 1:26:41

I assume you're gonna take those kids back to their families or give them to the republic.

SPEAKER_11 1:26:45

Well, I assume that maybe we can talk to the primary caregiver first and see if there's something else going on.

SPEAKER_07 1:26:52

Yeah, I'm sure she'll recognize you. What with how you look? No offense, look at how I look. I'm sure my master, were she still alive, would recognize me after many years.

SPEAKER_04 1:27:04

Illyria still has the box, right?

unknown 1:27:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_11 1:27:06

Illyria still has the box. And like Aura, like, we kind of established we don't know for certain, but if the two of us are any indication, she might have had a particular preference for going after kids who are in particularly troubled home situations. Perhaps, just perhaps, she's pulling these kids because they're in troubled home situations that are not gonna go very well. I don't know anything about my pants, but I do know that I probably would not have fared much better in life being raised by a couple spice heads. Putting that out there.

SPEAKER_01 1:27:39

If I don't go along with this, you're gonna blow my head off.

SPEAKER_11 1:27:42

Yes. Well, pfft fine. Okay, just a conversation.

SPEAKER_04 1:27:46

Not because not because I want to, but because uh but because we're on on the clock here, I feel.

SPEAKER_01 1:27:51

But and just he looks to Elyria and says, But you keep your hands where I can see them.

SPEAKER_07 1:27:56

I have marvelous self control. I have no gripe against you. Unless you go and murder this woman.

SPEAKER_01 1:28:04

The dispassionate actions of a Jedi, of course.

SPEAKER_11 1:28:08

Like, look, unless she, you know, deserves to die, we're not taking that off the table. Just, you know, putting a conversation on the table. That's all.

SPEAKER_07 1:28:16

What do you think we do? Do you think we just get these contracts and go and murder people? Well.

SPEAKER_01 1:28:20

You did kind of. Your jobs have been getting a lot more assassination-y lately.

unknown 1:28:30

Shh.

SPEAKER_11 1:28:31

Listen, we you know what? We're not gonna confess our pre our past uh falsified reports. Can I I'm gonna be bold and I'm gonna stand up from the grass where I think we are lurking and just have my hands up at Kuro, right, Master Kuro? Yeah. Master Kuro?

SPEAKER_01 1:28:50

And she looks over and she says, Oh, yes, I was wondering when you would join us. We have much to spare.

SPEAKER_04 1:28:55

I uh you were wondering w when we were going to join you. Could you please uh explain?

SPEAKER_01 1:29:02

Well, a uh handful of Jedi wanders onto my planet. I'm not going to not notice that, am I?

SPEAKER_04 1:29:09

That's that's fair. Um, so you know who's with us then.

SPEAKER_01 1:29:14

I have an idea, though I don't want to bring myself to hope that it could be true.

SPEAKER_04 1:29:21

Uh uh, is this a uh this seems like a uh a good sign? Uh I'm not going to lie to you because I'm my lying my deception stat is very bad. Um What do you mean by that?

SPEAKER_06 1:29:36

No.

SPEAKER_04 1:29:37

What I what I what I'm uh saying is we're here to uh investigate something.

SPEAKER_01 1:29:44

Why of course the bill comes due.

SPEAKER_04 1:29:47

Why why is he why are these children here? Why uh why was nobody s uh told anything? And honestly, like it seems like you have the uh the right uh heart in mind, but there's some those pieces of Zippuzzle missing.

SPEAKER_01 1:30:04

Well, you're right, I took these children from their families. Families did not want to let them find.

SPEAKER_04 1:30:10

Mission accomplished, let's go.

SPEAKER_11 1:30:12

Uh y yeah, because they were they they've been contacting the Jedi and then finding out that uh you might have well, we don't want to use the word coerced, but coerce the families out of custody. Oh yes. Okay. Uh shit, didn't really expect you to just say yeah that easily. Any context do you want to lend?

SPEAKER_04 1:30:30

Yes, please, uh uh spin us a story.

SPEAKER_01 1:30:34

Well, first I I want to apologize to Aura. If I'd known that you were alive, there's no way that I would have left you behind.

SPEAKER_04 1:30:41

Oh, she wants to uh just just so you know, she very much wants to kill you. I can feel it. Oh yeah, you can feel it. I can feel it too. It's fucked up.

SPEAKER_11 1:30:49

Yeah, so uh any any truth in the the thing that about uh you Selena?

SPEAKER_01 1:30:54

Selher no, of course not. She was kidnapped and killed, or so I thought. Perception.

SPEAKER_04 1:31:00

I know she hasn't I know she has a better uh uh uh this probably deception stat than I.

SPEAKER_01 1:31:07

Well we'll we'll have it against her cool, so that'll be against uh two red. Two red?

SPEAKER_04 1:31:11

Okay. Uh I'll roll two.

SPEAKER_11 1:31:13

My perception's pretty good.

SPEAKER_04 1:31:14

Yeah. Yeah, please. Not uh I don't want to be the only one because my perception is not great. Two red?

SPEAKER_11 1:31:21

Yeah. I got uh three success, two threat.

SPEAKER_04 1:31:24

I got one failure and three advantage.

SPEAKER_11 1:31:28

Do anyone else want to roll? See what we can get? Yeah, I'll try it out and see.

SPEAKER_09 1:31:33

Two red. Three advantage.

SPEAKER_07 1:31:36

Do you really want me to try this?

SPEAKER_11 1:31:39

You don't have to. I've I mean I got successes at least. I'm good. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 1:31:45

Starzan and Chris, you're getting like good vibes from her. Like, she is a light in the force. Beyond that, uh, you can't really tell if she's lying. Kala, y you do sense that she is being like completely forthright towards you, and she's being very open and honest about like that she basically stole these kids. Uh, to threat, you know, what else did she steal? Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 1:32:12

Oh.

SPEAKER_11 1:32:19

Who kind of look at Aura just like, what do you know? Pirates might have fucking lied. Groundbreaking shit.

SPEAKER_01 1:32:26

Well, she hasn't finished telling us her story, so why don't you get on it, old woman?

SPEAKER_11 1:32:31

I mean, yeah, it's probably worth telling us why you kidnapped all these kids and why you got them fairy just holed up here.

SPEAKER_01 1:32:38

And she says, Well, I was just so broken up about what happened to Aura that I couldn't go on. I had to find peace somewhere, so I came back here to this place where we trained. And I started to think and I started to wonder. And she was from the Smuggler's Moon, and it was there that she was taken from me, and there that I thought she had died, and I began to wonder if that was just the destiny that the force had in store for her. And that taking her to the Jedi was only a minor diversion that ultimately righted itself. You know, the force has a destiny for all of us, and we can struggle against it, but fighting destiny is a bit like trying to swim upstream in a raging river. The only thing that'll happen is you'll get tired and you'll be weakened and eventually you'll just get washed away. And I thought that maybe there are people out there who have similar destinies. And if we couldn't struggle against it, perhaps helping them to come ashore to rest would be beneficial, so I decided that I would continue my work as a seeker, that I would focus on finding cursed children who might benefit from a little rest to come ashore from the river of destiny, to delay it. So I brought them here to reduce their karma, the spiritual effect that they have on the universe around them. If they don't interact with the galaxy, then destiny has no reason to intervene. They could coexist together in peace, free to grow and learn, and now I suppose destiny has come calling.

SPEAKER_11 1:34:16

So before before you exiled yourself from the Jedi, I you know, personal interest, did you perhaps, um Am I cursed? Did you did you trick my family too? Do you d were they hoodwinked? Or uh you wouldn't know me and haven't seen me since I was a baby, but uh I know you, kinda, kinda.

SPEAKER_01 1:34:36

I seem to remember a Balasar family with a strange little girl. They couldn't handle, who they wanted to get rid of, who they were looking for someone to buy, and I'm just happy it was me who came along to do it. Perhaps this was the destiny the Force had in store for me to find children like Aura and like you and like the rest of my kids.

SPEAKER_04 1:35:02

Did you have to buy any children uh in your in your quest to make sure that uh the children have comfortable lives?

SPEAKER_01 1:35:10

Here or there when the parents were selling them.

SPEAKER_04 1:35:13

Oof.

SPEAKER_11 1:35:14

Oof. Okay, I look back at Aura just like, yeah, man, it sounds like it would be a really good thing to send them back to that home environment.

SPEAKER_04 1:35:21

Aura, what what do what do we what do we mi what uh what are we missing here? Please, uh, we want she's gonna be able to do that fumed.

SPEAKER_01 1:35:28

Oh. So so let me get this straight. Let me get this fucking straight. Uh, you're saying that the reason I spent six years with those pirates is because the force wanted me to do that? That that that was my destiny? That this is all part of some some grand plan for my life, that this is that's what I get. She's got her hands on her blaster. She's uh Alright.

SPEAKER_00 1:35:53

I don't think she would hesitate to shoot me.

SPEAKER_04 1:35:55

I don't listen. Yeah, no, I'm I'm I'm gonna I'm gonna s I'm gonna say look look everybody, I don't think that be i I I think because uh just because you are in incompatible doesn't mean that you are against each other.

SPEAKER_11 1:36:13

Can I yeah, can I kind of step between Aura and Kuro Kuro after f yes, Kuro. Step between Aura and Kuro and be like, that sounded bad, or I get that. But you know better than anyone that sometimes life is fucking rough for people. She's trying to make sure that more kids don't go through the same thing that you did. Like, I I feel like she's being honest, or I'm getting that vibe, but I feel like you're getting that vibe too.

SPEAKER_01 1:36:46

Seems like she's trying to dam a river. And you know what happens when the dam breaks, there's a flood. She's doing all this because she thinks she can delay destiny. How much of that how much of that is being built up, huh? She she went and picked up you to save you from a from some kind of terrible fate, putting you in the Jedi. How much how much of that terrible fate do you think's been pent up? How hard do you think things are gonna come down on you when the time comes?

SPEAKER_11 1:37:13

I don't know. Probably pretty hard, Aura, but at least I'll be in my fucking thirties when it happens instead of being a child. Do you really want that eight-year-old back there to go back to their home planet and go through whatever the fuck you had to go through?

SPEAKER_01 1:37:26

No.

SPEAKER_11 1:37:27

Or do you think that maybe we can pent up fate for a little while longer so they can at least be in their 30s when they have to deal with this sort of shit?

SPEAKER_01 1:37:34

She said the bills come due. I'm here to collect. She's gonna start firing at the kids. I can tackle.

SPEAKER_11 1:37:47

I'm like, I'm probably too close for my gun to be really useful here.

SPEAKER_07 1:37:51

I start pulling out the button.

SPEAKER_01 1:37:53

Yeah, give me a give me a vigilance to see if you can uh how quick you can smash that like button.

SPEAKER_07 1:38:01

I I I didn't want to like blow her up right away.

SPEAKER_04 1:38:04

I mean, she's already shooting at the kids.

SPEAKER_01 1:38:06

Yeah, to see if you can Yeah. If you want to smash that like button before she uh You are you are at the switch of the trolley problem. And you can see like in the dim firelight, the other kids are like there are some like lumps in like sleeping bags in some of the destroyed buildings that are probably the younger kids.

SPEAKER_07 1:38:27

Oh no!

SPEAKER_11 1:38:28

Why would you do this, Horace Egg?

SPEAKER_07 1:38:31

I want to blow this woman's head up in front of a bunch of children. Well, it's much better than their heads being blown up. Yeah, I guess.

SPEAKER_09 1:38:38

Yeah, you don't you you don't have to. It makes you feel better. It is what Superman would do.

SPEAKER_11 1:38:44

Yeah, give him the Snyder Snap.

SPEAKER_01 1:38:46

So uh this would be vigilance versus cool, I guess, to see if you can uh pull it out before she can get a shot off.

SPEAKER_07 1:38:53

At me? Oh, at the kids, okay.

SPEAKER_01 1:38:56

Yeah. So this is gonna be against uh well, just yeah, just roll yours. We'll call it initiative.

SPEAKER_07 1:39:03

Just roll my vigilance?

SPEAKER_01 1:39:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 1:39:06

One success.

SPEAKER_01 1:39:08

Okay. Hell yeah. Four success, four advantages. Jeez.

SPEAKER_11 1:39:13

I stepped in front of her. Does she at least have to shoot through me first?

SPEAKER_01 1:39:17

Well, you were s uh stepping between her and Kiro. She is firing off to the side at the kids.

SPEAKER_11 1:39:24

Ooh.

SPEAKER_01 1:39:26

See the kids uh short range.

SPEAKER_11 1:39:29

Oh god, I'm close to her. Can I get my life dagger out? Can I stab her in the gut?

SPEAKER_01 1:39:33

Sure, roll me a vigilance. You'll have to beat four success, four advantage.

SPEAKER_11 1:39:37

Oh I mean my vigilance is pretty good. It's good-ish.

SPEAKER_04 1:39:43

Four success and four advantage. Let's see if I can beat that vigilance here with my two green.

SPEAKER_11 1:39:48

I got two success and four advantage. I got three success.

SPEAKER_09 1:39:53

Vigilance. One success. Nope. Use lesson.

SPEAKER_01 1:39:58

Uh, she gets two success and three advantages. So yeah, she blasts a couple of the teenagers right in the chest.

SPEAKER_09 1:40:08

No! Oh no. Set to stun, right?

SPEAKER_01 1:40:11

Nope.

SPEAKER_09 1:40:12

Set to stun, right?

SPEAKER_11 1:40:14

Elyria has heal harm. Maybe she can help them before they die.

SPEAKER_01 1:40:18

Maybe, but Allyria also has the uh the bomb, so she's gonna have to choose what to do here.

SPEAKER_09 1:40:24

Another trolley problem, fuck shit.

SPEAKER_07 1:40:26

How long does it take to press a button?

SPEAKER_01 1:40:28

You can be you can smash that like button now. You just couldn't do it before uh before she could shoot.

SPEAKER_07 1:40:35

Yeah, maybe just smash that shit and someone say do it to make me feel better about doing this. Do it! I will smash that button.

SPEAKER_01 1:40:44

Don't forget to like, subscribe. Blow up. So, uh, you can smash that button. Our Singh is a pretty, pretty tough bounty hunter.

SPEAKER_07 1:40:52

You can blow my neck clear off and I keep going.

SPEAKER_11 1:40:55

I was gonna say, is there a chance that she could survive a neck bomb?

SPEAKER_07 1:40:59

That's a robot brain.

SPEAKER_01 1:41:00

Yeah, she does have a robot brain. Now the explosive implant, it it does automatically kill. So the trick would be, would she be would her robot brain implant be able to intercept the signal?

SPEAKER_07 1:41:13

Oh. Are you gonna ask me to do a ranged light for my finger to hit the button?

SPEAKER_01 1:41:18

Uh no. Um, so she's gonna have to do a computers? She's gonna have to do a computers. It's a red and four purple medicine or mechanics check to remove the implant. Implant will say it's the same to intercept a signal. Gonna give her- I'm gonna give her a fighting chance. I'm gonna use a destiny point here to upgrade her computers roll. Uh three failures and a threat. So uh there is a puff of blood as the back of Aurasync's neck is just exploded open. Uh her head like falls limp down at her chest, like her, like her mouth and her nose is impact against her collarbone as it all just becomes loose hanging there by the flesh of her throat.

SPEAKER_11 1:41:57

Ooh.

SPEAKER_01 1:41:59

She crumples into a pile. I guess she won't be in that other Clone Wars episode she was in.

SPEAKER_11 1:42:04

No time to worry about that. Can I run over to the teens? I got stim packs! Are any of them saveable?

SPEAKER_01 1:42:10

Uh, you can run over and start. Uh why don't you give me some medicine here? Oh no. She did manage to shoot two of them. So if you want to.

SPEAKER_09 1:42:18

Because because giant muscle man is apparently always have to play nannies at some point, I will take care of the other children and like huddle them away from the violence.

SPEAKER_11 1:42:27

Will you get a will you get a blue the Arnold Schwartzen hat advantage?

SPEAKER_04 1:42:32

Yeah, I'm I'm gonna I'm gonna help them take care of the kids.

SPEAKER_01 1:42:35

Okay. Uh so uh it will be a two-purple medicine for each of them. Uh anybody who wants to it'll take one of you to roll, and then if somebody else wants to provide assistance, that'll add a blue.

SPEAKER_11 1:42:47

Yeah, everyone except Illyria has a two intellect. Yeah. And no ranks in medicine.

SPEAKER_04 1:42:53

I'm I mean, I I will still help, like, you know, just tell me what to do, I will do it, kind of thing.

SPEAKER_11 1:42:58

Sure, I'll I'll I'll roll if Chris assists me, and then maybe Starze can assist Illyria.

SPEAKER_01 1:43:03

Okay, so for uh Kala and Illyria, then that'll be a two purple and a blue medicine each.

SPEAKER_11 1:43:08

Do we have any destiny?

SPEAKER_01 1:43:09

Yeah, you have two. I'm gonna flip one to get a yellow.

SPEAKER_11 1:43:12

Yeah. Oh no, one failure! Oh no. Can I just do a stim pack?

SPEAKER_01 1:43:17

Illyria, what do you get?

SPEAKER_07 1:43:18

One success, one triumph, one advantage.

SPEAKER_11 1:43:21

Okay, so you can try to be the she is just like, get out of here, I got a bulk.

SPEAKER_01 1:43:25

Yeah, one of them, it seems like he was just grazed, uh, so Illyria can like just apply a quick stim pack and then rush over, and Kala has no idea what she's doing. Like, unless it's an adrenaline needle to the heart when somebody's overdosing on heroin, you don't know how to bring somebody back. So Elyria can kind of push you out of the way, get this other one uh up and around, or at least like not dead.

SPEAKER_09 1:43:50

So you know, of course, you know what the kids both say when they when they come to.

SPEAKER_01 1:43:53

Yeah, they say in unison, well, that happened.

SPEAKER_09 1:44:00

Wonderful.

SPEAKER_11 1:44:01

I'm yeah, fucking fucking Callus that's just like, all I know how to do to help someone is a Mr. Narcan, man. I don't have it. What do I do about a gunshot?

SPEAKER_07 1:44:14

Uh not.

SPEAKER_11 1:44:15

Oh thank god. Okay, everyone else is okay?

SPEAKER_07 1:44:19

I feel slightly better because you said do it for me to press the button.

SPEAKER_11 1:44:23

You know what? I feel slightly better that you were here to get these to help the kids. Oh, um, oh god. Okay, hi Master Koro.

SPEAKER_01 1:44:31

How uh She's um like on her knees. She's holding the headless corpse of Aura Singh. When she kind of turns around, you can see that she's just wiping a couple of tears away from her eyes. She does the uh Boba Fett thing with her head. With the head.

SPEAKER_00 1:44:52

Same. Why? A tender moment.

SPEAKER_07 1:44:55

It's not the will of the force. She was the one who made the choice to shoot the children.

SPEAKER_04 1:45:00

Sometimes it seems as though there's just sometimes people just want to die, which is unfortunate, but it is what it is. Uh why like I I I don't understand, but I don't uh feel as though I will ever understand.

SPEAKER_11 1:45:18

Yeah, I don't uh God, this is a fucking bummer, huh?

SPEAKER_01 1:45:22

Yes, it is, unfortunately, because now we're left with the question. Well the kind of question what to do with you.

SPEAKER_11 1:45:29

Well, when you put it like that, it sounds like you're gonna try to murder us, and I don't love that, Master.

SPEAKER_01 1:45:34

Well, you came here on a republic ship. Republic ship that I assume is being tracked. I can't let you report back and tell anyone where we are, or else that would defeat the entire purpose of bringing them here.

SPEAKER_11 1:45:46

Is there uh fuck, I don't know. Is there any way you could relocate a different planet?

SPEAKER_04 1:45:51

Maybe in maybe instead of having a uh us fight uh over yeah, over and over again, we can just say she atta she attacked us before we were able to f uh we were able to find you, and then, you know, you ca you can fuck off somewhere uh somewhere else.

SPEAKER_01 1:46:08

I won't be doing that. I destroyed my ship.

SPEAKER_02 1:46:11

Um get another, then I don't know. Fucking that seems like a you problem. We're planning on staying here. This is our home now.

SPEAKER_11 1:46:20

Okay, well, we have had a lot of fucking plans in our lives, haven't we?

SPEAKER_07 1:46:24

And just what if I mean we've falsified reports before. Can we falsify our flight records?

SPEAKER_11 1:46:32

I'd be able to. Maybe. Look, I feel like we're kind of all in agreement here implicitly that like we don't have any desire to turn you in. It doesn't seem like you're doing anything bad here. And uh, you know, we are in wartime. If these kids did end up going to the Jedi Temple. What? What do you mean what do I mean? What do you mean? What do you mean what do I mean?

SPEAKER_07 1:46:53

You don't have a radio out here or anything? No.

SPEAKER_01 1:46:55

No, zero karmic influence on the universe.

SPEAKER_02 1:46:59

I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_04 1:47:00

Are you s oh I'm sorry, are you surprised as the the the fact that there's something going on outside of this world and you don't know about it because you went no contact with everybody and now you're surprised that there's a war? Oh, I'm so fucking sorry about that. Now I'm so mad at you right now. Fuck off. Fuck off. You can die here if you want.

SPEAKER_11 1:47:20

I think what Chris is trying to say is it's been a tough and stressful year, and it's stressful to hear anyone who is not aware of that.

SPEAKER_01 1:47:30

Well, there hasn't been a war for a thousand years. I have no reason to expect that there would be one now.

SPEAKER_11 1:47:35

Well, there's one now. We are in wartime.

SPEAKER_04 1:47:38

Yeah. Uh like have you ever have you thought that, like, the fa the fact that you're uh cutting yours uh self off of everybody else is uh more detrimental than you uh make it out to be?

SPEAKER_01 1:47:51

Well, this is the way that I found to keep these kids safe from whatever destiny they would have had out in the galaxy. Thus far it seems to have worked, and even when fate sent its collector, she was routed.

SPEAKER_00 1:48:05

Okay. Are you talking about her?

SPEAKER_01 1:48:07

Singh, yes. I believe that she was brought here by the force to test the metal of my strategy.

SPEAKER_04 1:48:12

Routed? That's the word that you're that is the word that you're using? Routed?

SPEAKER_07 1:48:18

This seems like a lot of mental gymnastics for someone who didn't try to rescue your Padawan from pirates.

SPEAKER_04 1:48:25

Maybe you're not as good as you think you are. She's probably not TVH. Look, look, she shouldn't have shot at the kids. This is absolutely true, but maybe you shouldn't have taken these kids as yourself.

SPEAKER_01 1:48:37

I'm gonna try to mine now, and I'm keeping them here.

SPEAKER_07 1:48:40

I mean she's got no ships, she can't take any more.

SPEAKER_11 1:48:43

It's it's true, and like again, what I what I was trying to say before you ign you, you know, made us aware of the fact that you do not know what's going on at all. Is that true is that you're kind of a bad person. That was not what I was trying to- Oh my god, what is you you two have just fucking turned, huh? If anyone here should be upset, it's me. I she's I'm the one who she took, but anyways.

SPEAKER_07 1:49:09

I mean she actually took you to the NI.

SPEAKER_11 1:49:11

Okay, Olyria, just you and Chris.

SPEAKER_04 1:49:14

You and Chris, what's going on here? We'll we'll we'll we'll wait outside if you think you uh if you think you can make a deal with her.

SPEAKER_11 1:49:21

We are outside, we're all outside! We're by a campfire! There's a fire, Chris!

SPEAKER_04 1:49:28

We'll wait for the other side. The soup on the fire! We'll wait on the other side of the campfire.

SPEAKER_11 1:49:34

Oh my god, I was just saying that we're in wartime right now, and if these kids, these four sensitive kids, were taken to the Jedi Temple, that like if we were to turn her in, if we were to take them in, then they're just gonna get recruited into the fucking war and they're gonna die in battle. Like, it's not I don't think that we should be shutting her down here, because I don't think that's gonna be ultimately better for these people. Like, if you kid

SPEAKER_07 1:50:00

Kid that I slapped the stimpack on, not the not the one that I like had to the one who was grazed.

SPEAKER_01 1:50:06

Yeah.

unknown 1:50:06

Oh.

SPEAKER_01 1:50:07

You like this place? Uh yeah, there's cool monkeys here. Oh shit. Cool monkeys.

SPEAKER_11 1:50:12

Hell yeah, cool monkeys. I love a cool monkey, don't we all?

SPEAKER_09 1:50:17

Who doesn't love a cool monkey?

SPEAKER_11 1:50:19

Listen, what I was gonna say, ma'am, Master, Master Caro, do you still have your lightsaber? Of course. How else would I train these people? Okay, now you might not love this idea. We are with the SBI. We were sent to track you down to figure out what was going on with these kids. Clearly we know. And I think, again, I feel like we can all agree that taking them away is maybe not the best thing. What if, what if we took your lightsaber, brought that in as evidence that you had been killed. As for the kids, we say that Aura Singh was correct in everything she had been saying. You had sold her to pirates, and all the other kids that you kidnapped, you sold them to pirates too because you just wanted some more fucking credits. We don't know where the kids are. They can search for the kids, they've been sold, you're dead, nothing to look for. And Elyria's real good with computers. She could probably falsify our flight records and just say we, I don't know, fucker went to Nashida or something. And found you there.

SPEAKER_01 1:51:31

You're being kind of aggressive. Let's call this a coercion.

SPEAKER_11 1:51:34

Oh fuck. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 1:51:36

Uh I'm just stressed. This will be against four reds?

SPEAKER_11 1:51:41

Phew!

SPEAKER_00 1:51:42

Four reds?

SPEAKER_04 1:51:43

That seems excessive.

SPEAKER_11 1:51:44

Can Chris massage my toad and make it into a charm?

SPEAKER_07 1:51:49

Respectfully.

SPEAKER_11 1:51:50

You have to mean that. Chris workshot me. Push me aside and be like, what's she is trying to say?

SPEAKER_01 1:51:56

You do have a destiny point.

SPEAKER_11 1:51:58

Uh, one destiny point, huh?

SPEAKER_01 1:51:59

Destiny point.

SPEAKER_11 1:52:00

Perform it?

SPEAKER_01 1:52:01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_11 1:52:02

Oh! I'll flip it! I'll flip it! Do I want to get one yellow or take away one of those reds? I'm gonna get one yellow, you know? I feel like taking three four reds down to three probably isn't gonna make it much better. But maybe I get a triumph. Who knows? Maybe the force likes me today. I mean, it didn't before, but let's find out. I mean, it doesn't hate me. I got four failures, but four advantage. Maybe Chris can have a chance to massage my tone.

SPEAKER_01 1:52:30

Yeah, if somebody wants to step in and sort of like explain things in a less aggressive way, you can add two glutes.

SPEAKER_04 1:52:38

If we don't get back to uh the people by a certain time, they will come looking for us and they will be able to find us. This w uh if we get back to them and uh we uh do a couple of things to make sure that they know that uh that we didn't come here, but instead we came went somewhere else. You'll be out of the way and nobody will come f uh come for you. And there are other ways to defend yourself.

SPEAKER_01 1:53:03

So uh this will be a charm. This will be a charm against two reds. Two success and four advantage. Hey! Must be the money. And she unclips her lightsaber from her belt, uh, and hands it to you. It's a very ornate design, purple metallic, seems to be almost like covered in in these little metallic uh vines. It looks like a a flower almost that is about to about to blossom. And she says, take this back to the Jedi then. Tell them that you hunted me down, that I killed Or Singh and you were forced to take my life. See that everybody wins.

SPEAKER_11 1:53:47

Thank you, Master. Thank you for uh being reasonable.

SPEAKER_04 1:53:50

Except for except for her, that poor woman. Poor lady.

SPEAKER_11 1:53:53

Yeah. But uh also, you know, sorry about my uh my tone, tense day and everything, you know.

SPEAKER_01 1:53:59

Force, it's interesting. Hmm? Well, the force is using Aura as an instrument of fate. She came here to test my strategy to try and force destiny to give these cursed children the fate that they were ordained, and you managed to put an end to it. It's a rare thing. What? Fucking blowing up someone's neck bomb? No.

SPEAKER_04 1:54:23

Honestly, we haven't done Zet. We haven't done Zet before, so yeah, it's new to us.

SPEAKER_01 1:54:28

It's new to us. It's not every day that somebody changes the course of destiny.

SPEAKER_04 1:54:32

Did you hear Zed? We're special. Well, let's get the fuck out of here before anybody changes their minds.

SPEAKER_01 1:54:40

Okay, so uh it'll be a three purple to reprogram the computer. Your flight logs falsify. Hey, can I rifle in Aurosync's pockets before we go?

SPEAKER_06 1:54:49

Jesus.

SPEAKER_11 1:54:50

Listen, she had a really good gun. Maybe she has something else really good on her.

SPEAKER_00 1:54:54

Uh well she's got her two blaster pistols.

SPEAKER_02 1:54:57

Straight from prison.

SPEAKER_00 1:54:58

She's got That's true, she wants right she was right out of prison. Her gun was being sold. She does have her orange bodysuit and vest. I'm not stealing her clothes. That's uh that's a little bit too disrespectful.

SPEAKER_11 1:55:11

She's got prison.

SPEAKER_09 1:55:13

A shiv made out of a toothbrush. It's hard to get blood out.

SPEAKER_11 1:55:18

You know what? I'll leave the guns if uh if the master doesn't have her lightsaber, maybe they'll need something else to defend themselves in the future. Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 1:55:26

One successful advantage while you're doing this.

SPEAKER_01 1:55:29

Yeah, so while you're rifling around in her pockets, uh Illyria can uh falsify the flight log. Say that you uh came to and from Narshida, dealt with the Jedi Master, who uh left you with some interesting parting words to consider. If you were able to route Destiny today and kill a character before her uh ordained fate, and to uh route the fates of these children, what other galactic events might you be able to change? Perhaps you will find out next time on Star Wars Empire Wreckers. This episode of Empire Wreckers is brought to you by our top patrons, Alpha Bros 522, David B, Eric Charles Perazzo, Jeffrey Zamuto, Joshua Winter, Laser, LKB, Suki Nintendo, Thomas Davidson, and Vaginator.